The journey that changed it all
by AmeliaBlake
Summary: 10 years since Naraku's death, four years since Rin last saw Kohaku after a rather intense moment, time for her to return to her Lord Sesshomaru and Kohaku (with the help of Shippo) must see she gets there safely. But the journey takes a turbulent start when Rin learns something about Kohaku that she doesn't like. will they rekindle what they felt during their last moment together?
1. You came back

**The journey that changed it all**

**Chapter 1**

**You came back**

Ten years passed since Naraku's defeat, for those ten years I have lived amongst humans and have not only grown accustomed to their presence, but also found myself enjoying it, well most of it. I wandered wistfully through a nearby pasture picking flowers to place upon Lady Kaede's grave. It was a year last week that she passed away peacefully in her sleep. I missed her and thought of her every day, but I tried only to recall the pleasant times we shared, the times that brought a smile to my face. The woman was like a grandmother to me, raising me to be a priestess like her…I never did take to it, despite how hard I tried.

In all honestly there was nothing particularly special about me, I wasn't a fighter…I had no spiritual powers. I was a forager, a looter…A hunter, I could track anything down…I could trace their last movements from days before and follow them to the end of the world. It was a talent that went greatly unappreciated by other members of the village. I however, took pride in my skills…it was all I had, I wasn't very pretty…that's what all the other girls in the village told me and they must be right as no boys ever took an interest in me. I'm not particularly smart either…I wasn't very good at reading; even Sango had given up teaching me. I couldn't tell a decent joke to save my life. I tried so hard to be all of the above, I washed every day…I used all kinds of scented oils to make myself smell nice and on special occasions I painted my lips rouge. I studied hard to become more intelligent but I could never concentrate….I was always itching to get outside and wander the forests. Deep down I was still a young girl who longed to travel the country, to serve the Lord who saved her life.

I turned eighteen this very day, it was this day my Lord had promised to return to me and give me the choice to either remain in the village or return with him to his newly established kingdom in the far West. When I first arrived here, it would have been the easiest decision in the world; I would have jumped at the chance of reuniting with my Lord…until four years ago when a certain boy complicated everything. I picked another flower, holding it gingerly between finger and thumb I saw his face between the petals, "Kohaku" I sighed dreamily at the memory of that day…..

-Flashback

"_Rin?" crooned the voice of my best friend, my head was buried in my hands but at the sound of his voice, sending shivers down my spine, I peered up, wiping the tears off my face. There he stood all six foot two of my seventeen year old crush._

"_Kohaku?" I sniffed a blush burning my face "you're back?"_

_He nodded his face beholding such concern, how my heart fluttered! "Yeah, I came to see Sango and the latest edition to our family, my nephew, Minoru" he responded._

_I feigned a light smile "Yeah, this is their fourth one! Miroku is already talking about having another…he hopes for another set of twins"._

_Usually this would make Kohaku laugh and we'd ridicule the former monk whilst at the same time, praising what a wonderful father and loving husband he was. However, his mind seemed preoccupied, he sat next to me staring at my red puffy face with his delicious honey brown eyes, I gulped down my anxiety, he was sitting so close! I almost had a heart attack when he put his arm around my shoulder! "Why have you been crying?" he asked._

_I sighed, "It's nothing…I'm just being stupid" I wished I made more of an effort this day, I should have at least worn sandals rather the running around with no barefooted, I'm fourteen for crying out loud, practically a woman! Kohaku's hand squeezed my shoulder gently, he pulled me in closer so that my head was on his shoulder with his chin resting upon it._

"_If it upsets you then it's not stupid…please just tell me Rin, otherwise I'll worry about it for weeks…maybe even months!"_

_He was so kind to me, the only boy that had paid me any attention…but that was to be expected, after all we went through together…after that dark period in our lives when were still so very young, just children. No one would ever be able to understand me the way he does…all the other girls have no idea the kind of things I faced with him and yet they still thought they'd make a better match for him than me…I don't know may they're right._

_Kohaku shook me slightly for encouragement, I gave another heavy sigh "it's the other girls…they called me ugly and dirty…they said I was stupid….they said I'm a freak because of association with Lord Sesshomaru…and that no boy would dare kiss the lips of a girl who uses them to speak so kindly about a vile demon!" I again burst into tears, reliving all that ridicule._

_A scowl swept across his face, he seemed almost outraged, he pulled me in completely, into a warm comforting embrace "they're lying Rin…they're just jealous!" he insisted holding me so tightly, I took this opportunity to hold him as I had always daydreamed of doing._

"_Jealous? Jealous of what! I'm so ugly…no boy will ever kiss me!" I wept rather pathetically._

_To my surprise with, Kohaku responded with a chuckle, I was so confused that I stopped crying and frowned at him. He saw this and proceeded to explain himself "Rin…that is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard come out of your mouth, and you talk a lot" he spoke, "I could write a list of a thousand things that make you beautiful…the very word defines you! However, would you like to hear my favourite thing about that pretty face of yours?" _

_My heart was about to stop! I couldn't breathe….cheeks burning hotter than flames! I nodded hoping he didn't notice._

"_Your smile" he stated happily, I was still confused so he continued "Surly you know what a lovely smile you have! I'll bet my very life that those girls would kill to have your smile! When you grin…your entire face lights up and your eyes practically glow, when someone is sad…one smile from you and all their pain just ebbs away. I mean, come on! Your smile is what melted the icy heart of one of the greatest, most powerful demon Lords in the entire world! It's what lead us into the underworld…we would have done anything to see that smile again…even risked our very lives for it. That's your most magical quality, your…special power…don't let them girls take it away from you…they don't know you like I do, they'll never know what we risked…what we fought for. You are so loved by some pretty extraordinary people, if they hate you…then let them, their hate is so insignificant in comparison to immense love we have for you"._

_My heart raced, tears of bliss came burning to my eyes, by this time my whole face glowed red! I don't know what possessed me, something strong and fierce took over! I grabbed his face in my hands and pulled his face to mine, crushing my lips against his. My eyes were closed but I didn't need to look to know his eyes were wide open from shock, it's when his lips began to relax and mould with mine and his arms folded tenderly around me that I knew he had closed them. My first kiss! Kohaku was kissing me back, his hands cupping my face! After what seemed like a decade we released each other lips to breathe, my face still in his hands he rested his forehead against mine…._

-End of Flash back

…But that was four years ago and he left the day after without a another word to me and I hadn't seen him since. I was always hoping that he would return soon, for four years I had waited…not speaking to another male other than her Lord Sesshomaru on those rare occasions when he would visit. I really thought he would have come back when he heard the news that his sister had given birth to yet another baby boy two years ago, even more so when only a month ago they discovered she was expecting another! When Lady Kaede died, I needed him more than ever, luckily Kagome was there, she and Inuyasha stayed with me at the graveside till it grew cold and they forced inside the hut that was now solely me.

The more I thought about all this the more I thought I will go to my Lord Sesshomaru, I'll forget all about that stupid Kohaku! It was decided, soon he would return for me, he usually came at sunset so I had time to say my goodbyes and lay a fresh bouquet of handpicked flowers at Kaede's graveside and bid warm goodbyes to the others.

More cheerfully I began to sing an old song of mine as I continued to pick flowers "_In the mountains in the breeze, in the forest in my dreams…Lord Sesshomaru where are you? Jaken is serving under you too…I will__ wait for you, on my own….please return to me, waiting all alone_".

It was as my song came to an end that I heard a familiar voice calling my name, I turned to see my old demon friend racing towards me, "Shippo!" I cheered racing to him with such enthusiasm, he embraced me like an old friend, lifting me up and twirling me. He had gotten so tall and fearless, not to mention handsome, he had many fox demon ladies chasing him.

"It's so good to see you!" I squealed sincerely, he beamed at me…he was still so playful, as always, due to that mischievous nature his kind seemed to have.

"It's been too long" he agreed, "I've just seen everyone, can you believe how big Kagome's son is now, he's almost six years old and Sango is having another baby! I knew Miroku wouldn't be able to keep his hands off her!"

I giggled, it brought me such joy to see him again, he was seventeen now and extremely talented in his craft of fox magic, he promised to later dazzle me with what he'd recently mastered. "You're surprised now, just wait till we get back to the hut…someone is here to see you" he said knowingly whilst they wandered to Kaede's grave, I squeaked with excitement _Lord Sesshomaru is here already! Time for my life to begin!_

* * *

My anticipation grew as we grew closer to the village, I had already packed the things I wanted to take with me to the western lands. Shippo turned to the opposite direction I was going, "Uh Shippo" I called, "my hut is that way" I pointed let, my friend smiled smugly.

"We're going to Sango and Miroku's" he stated as-a-matter-of-factly, I frowned, why is lord Sesshomaru meeting me there? I didn't argue, I just followed after Shippo obediently.

When we arrived we were greeted by two of Miroku and Sango's sons, Hitoshi (aged seven) and Minoru (aged four). They ran to Shippo and I with such enthusiasm, calling out both our names with excitement, I picked up Minoru and held him to my hip while Shippo ruffled Hitoshi's hair. We were soon greeted by the twins Yuki and Yuka (both ten) they blushed bashfully when they saw Shippo, both having developed huge crushes on him.

"Mother! Father! Rin and Shippo are here!" Yuki called into the hut, almost instantly the two parents came out, Sango holding her latest edition Kou (aged two) whilst brewing another inside her. They smile to see us.

"Children, why don't you run along and play, your mother and I need to speak with Shippo and Rin alone" asked Miroku facing them all, they obediently agreed, Sango handed Kou to Yuka and I placed Minoru down. They ran off happily together like perfect siblings.

"The twins grow more like their mother everyday" I said to Sango who, still had the radiant glow of motherhood, Miroku snaked his arm around his wife's waist.

"And Just as beautiful" he beamed making Sango blush; like Kagome and Inuyasha…these two were made for each other, there was no way they could be with anyone else. Miroku had proven himself a loyal and faithful husband, seeming to grow more in love with his wife each day.

"I'll say" said Shippo with a slight hint of mirth and arms folded, "in another six years or so…maybe they'll care to bare my children".

This earned him a whack around they head from the furious father leaving a large bump on his head, "Never….never say that again…unless you hold n value to your life!" Miroku sneered "I've already told the girls, they will be nuns someday, I'll leave it to the boys to marry and give me grandchildren".

Sango rolled her eyes and smiled at me, I laughed, "come inside…there is someone here to see you" she said and guided us in to her home.

When I saw who awaited me there I could not supress my gasp, my knees buckled under me, my palms began to sweat, _oh Kami! It's like being fourteen all over again damn it!_ He looked more handsome than the last time I saw him, had he really grown another two inches? His shoulders were so broad, he had rugged stubble on his face…his boyish looks had faded, in their place stood a ridiculously good looking young man of twenty-one.

"K-Kohaku" I stammered like a frightened child, a huge grin touched his face…it melted my heart away almost completely, I was about to swoon. He had come back…I remembered that he promised he would the day he left, the day after we kissed. "_I'll see you again, I'll come back…I promise_" those were his words and he kissed her goodbye too.

His reasons for leaving in the first place was to become a more fierce demon slayer, he clearly accomplished this. Maybe he had grown tired of that life style and wanted to settle down…with me maybe I dared to think to myself.

"It's good to see you again Rin" he said politely, I beamed.

I ran to him and threw my arms about his neck and hugged him tightly, practically choking him "I can't believe it's you! I'm so glad your back!" I exclaimed, to my dismay he did not hug me back, he was so tall that my feet were off the floor, I was dangling by his neck. When he did not reciprocate my hug a sheepishly released him and backed away returning to my former place next Shippo, trying to ignore their surprised and scrutinising looks. I don't understand why he was being so cold.

"So" Shippo spoke, breaking the awkward silence "what brings you back Kohaku" he asked.

"I'm here on an errand for Sesshomaru…I'm doing this as a favour for all the help had once give me" Kohaku responded simply, this got Rin's attention "he sent me to collect Rin, if she wishes to join her Lord and serve him once again she must embark on a journey to him…if she reaches there then she has earned her place within his court" the young and beautiful man explained, I blinked…so much to take in.

"But the way to his kingdom is a dangerous path" Miroku reminded with sincere concern, Kohaku nodded at his brother-in-law.

"And that is why I am to escort her, if she were anyone else, Lord Sesshomaru would have let them face the journey alone, he has entrusted me to protect Rin along the way, to ensure she gets there safely" he answered, Miroku still wasn't very convinced, he noticed his wife's face sink with fear and placed a comforting arm around her shoulder.

"Well I'm coming too" Shippo told him gesturing his thumb to himself, "no way I'm letting you guys go alone I wanna know first-hand that Rin get their safely".

This clearly made no difference to Kohaku so he made no argument against it, I however wanted to kick the fox demon, I'd have liked time alone with Kohaku.

"Do you wish to join your Lord" The handsome demon slayer acknowledged me with such formality. It was so cold and callous that it rendered me speechless all I do was nod.

"Very well" he continued, "we leave at first light, you'll stay with us so we can leave quicker, it's crowded here so we'll camp outside".

Sango stepped forward, "Okay, let me make you some food to take with you…Rin, Shippo don't forget to say goodbye to Kagome and Inuyasha" she instructed, we both nodded.

"The earlier we get to sleep the earlier we can leave" Kohaku told us both, Shippo frowned.

"Why the rush?" he asked "Can't we have breakfast first?"

Finally Kohaku showed some emotion, he averted his gaze almost nervously, "I-I have to hurry back, I promised them I wouldn't be long".

"Who?" Sango asked curiously, she asked what I was too afraid to "_who_ and _where_ are you heading _back _to?"

He paused and then stuttered words that made something inside me shatter and his sister squeal with delight "the woman I've promised to marry"…


	2. How do you know?

**Chapter 2**

**How do you know?**

Kohaku's POV 

Sango was happy to see Kirara again; she nuzzled into her fur and held her tiny form…the fire neko demon followed her everywhere. "You've been treating her so well brother! I knew you would" she praised me, it was nice to see the two of them together again.

Night fell swiftly, engulfing every last remaining drop of sunlight, Inuyasha, apparently recognising mine and Shippo's scent, came to the hut just as Sango was tucking the youngest of her children into bed (the others already fast asleep).

"Look who it is" Inuyasha spoke in his usual manner, he looked at me and Shippo, scrutinising us. "You guys actually look like men now".

Kagome had to stay at her home with her child and so Rin, Sango (taking Kirara along with her) and Shippo left to visit her leaving me, my brother-in-law and Inuyasha alone. As I watched Rin leave I again took notice of how lovely she'd become...now a fully grown woman. Her eyes were burning amber gold framed with thick long lashes, her raven hair fell way past her tiny waist. The thing I noticed most was her smile…she still had that same smile. I swear there was not hate in that girl, there was sometimes anger, but no…never any hate. I noticed she fell quiet when I announced my betrothal , probably because I had been acting so cold, but I had my reasons.

Miroku had caught me staring and chuckled quietly, saying "try to keep your eyes inyour head there Kohaku…they look like they're about to fall out".

We sat by the fire pit and it wasn't long after Sango left that her youngest, Kou awoke and now slept in his father's arms…I'd give anything to be two years old again, so innocent and unscarred by this world.

"So" Miroku began, clearing his throat, "you say her name is Suzu? Your bride- to-be"

My head was so deep in thoughts of another that I almost didn't hear what he asked me, "huh? Oh…yeah Suzu" was all I muster.

The orange flames flickered their warmth upon my face, I wondered what Suzu would be doing at this very moment…was she worried for me? I prayed for her safety and that she wouldn't still be angry with me for leaving by the time I returned to the village.

"So…how did you two meet?" Miroku pushed on when I didn't go into further detail, as I probably should have but for some reason I couldn't fathom, my thoughts were all over the place and I couldn't think straight.

Collecting some coherent thought I answered him "She was the daughter of the headman in a village that I saved from a demon, she was offered to me as a reward"

Their eyes turned wide "no one ever offered us women!" Miroku exclaimed almost with a hint of envy, lucky Sango wasn't here. Kou stirred in his father's arms, almost awakened by his outburst, Miroku gently rocked his son to this former state of peace.

"Things sure have changed since our fighting days…and you accepted this _generous_ offer" said the silver haired half demon.

I shrugged "I had already stayed there for a month and gotten to know her pretty well, then after the battle she nursed me back to health, she's very kind…a little too mischievous sometimes…but still, very sweet. She was with me when I received word from one of Lord Sesshomaru's servants of the mission he intended to send me on….she wasn't happy that I accepted".

Miroku and Inuyasha cackled, "get used to it" Inuyasha teased "it doesn't get any better when you're married, soon you'll be in trouble over the littlest thing! It'll be "Kohaku I told you not use the wind scar in the hut! Ah! Sit boy!" then next thing you know you're hitting the dirt".

The two of us just stared at him, blinking…what was he rambling about? Wind scar? Sit boy? Miroku shook his head, "honestly Inuyasha you'll give the poor boy the wrong idea about marriage…I assure you Kohaku, (and Inuyasha will agree) when you find the right woman…marriage is a decision you'll never come to regret".

I tensed up at this…no one else was around but these two with me…maybe it wouldn't hurt ask the question that's been burning my brain for a month now. "How do you know?" I asked them quietly, I felt like a young boy again, "how do you know you've _met _the right woman…how do you know she's the one you should spend the rest of your life with?"

This clearly caused some unease, Inuyasha averted his eyes…Miroku sighed and spoke first "Honestly…" he began "I wasn't sure for a very long time…I of course knew that I loved your sister, but even after I proposed, I wasn't completely sure. Then as our journey continued I realised that…she was the only person I could think of being with and the thought of another man even looking at her made me sick. When I fantasised about a future with the wind tunnel gone…Sango was always in it. Then finally, on that horrifying last battle with Naraku when the only this I was certain of, was death…"he paused for a moment looking cautiously at me, Sango probably told him never to mention that name around me, she was still so protective even now. Seeing I was okay Miroku continued "…she clung to me and asked me to take her with me…to let her die with me…that's when I knew that I could never again love another woman and that I didn't ever want to either. Basically you may not know right away…but there will come a moment...one little moment that'll make everything clear to you".

I hoped he was right…I wanted what these guys had, I wanted someone to love with all my heart. Years had passed and I was still haunted by the memories of my sins, I still awoke at night calling the names of my father and comrades. My memories were still slightly hazed their like something from a previous life…I guess that's what drew me to Suzu…She didn't know the man I _was_…but the man I _am now. _The two men before me were able to share their entire life with their women…I couldn't, nor did I want to.

"this is way too mushy for me" Inuyasha spoke standing to his feet "I'm going home" though he wouldn't admit, I could tell Miroku's speech made him long to see his Kagome.

"And I should get Kou back to bed" He spoke "If you don't mind me saying Kohaku but maybe you and Shippo should stay in Rin's hut tonight…I've realised, there simply isn't enough room".

_Yeah right_ I scoffed internally, he just didn't want us around when Sango got home…honestly he's such a lecher, she was already carrying his sixth child! I shuddered, I may have grown to a man with similar urges but that's still my sister, I freaks me out! Inuyasha knew this too and frowned.

"Whatever, come on Kohaku you can collect Rin and Shippo from my place", with that I followed him out…

Rin's POV

We sat in the warmth of Kagome's hut, she had replaced Kaede as the village priestess and was filling in nicely. She had tucked her son in bed and busied herself over a pot of stew.

"I miss you ninja snacks" Shippo lamented mournfully.

We sat around the brewing pot, Sango was stroking Kirara and Kagome began serving the warm 2i bowls of stew.

"I can't believe my brother's getting married!" Sango exclaimed excitedly, "though from what he described of her, I'm slightly surprised. She's apparently _very_ spirited, likes to play a lot of pranks….I always figured my brother would want someone a little more…mature"

"I know" Kagome agreed "what was her name again?"

"Suzu…." I murmured … "what does that name even mean?"

"Bell" Kagome answered simpily.

"Oh"…..

"She sounds like a real beauty" Shippo chimed in, I glared at him furiously as did Sango and Kagome.

"Shippo!" Kagome chided "You were around Miroku too much when you were younger!"

Shippo raised his hands in defeat, Kagome was scary when she angry…I almost felt sorry for him, almost. "Hey!" he hollered in his defence, surrounded by angry woman "what did I say? What if she is beautiful…is that a bad thing? She is joining your family after all Sango".

The three of us simmered down, she probably was beautiful…I wonder when he met her…was it soon after he left me? I guess I had not right to be angry, he promised only one thing…that he would come back and he did. It was just one kiss…four years ago, it was nothing…he had every right to run off and fall in love. I only wish that I could have had the same chance.

"Anyway" Sango continued with one final glare at Shippo and scratching the back Kirara's ear "you must be very excited Rin…you'll finally be reunited with Lord Sesshomaru".

My heart skipped a beat…finally the wish I had made all those years ago was about to come true. I would be able to be with Lord Sesshomaru. At least he didn't forget me, I knew he wouldn't! Suzu could have Kohaku's affection, I had my lord…maybe he would find me a suitor. "I know!" I sueaked happily "I can't wait to see him again! Him _and _Master Jaken…oh and Ah-Un".

As we finished up eating we were soon joined by Inuyasha and Kohaku. I thought I was in better spirits till I saw his face, _I can't believe I have to endure the entire journey with him!_ Well it shouldn't take too long, and it would be worth it in the end…I'd be taken safely Sesshomaru.

Inuyasha traipsed over to his wife "is Kioshi asleep?" he asked softly, she nodded gazing up at him lovingly, his hand cupping her cheek.

A light seemed to radiate from them, they glowed with love…I felt a slight pang of envy as I watched them. I looked up and saw Kohaku was looking at them in the same way I was…probably thinking Suzu , he felt my gaze upon him and his eyes flickered to me, quickly I turned my face with deep red blush. _Please tell me he didn't see me staring_!

"Rin, Shippo " Kohaku called "we will stay at Rin's hut…we should leave now, we need to wake up early".

Bidding swift goodbyes we left for my hut…

888

"You've been very quiet Rin" Kohaku mentioned, he had hardly said a word directly to me, I was slightly taken aback.

We'd almost reached my home.

"So, you _have _noticed that I exist" I snapped back, I don't know what was possessing me! Kohaku showed more emotion on his face then he did the entire time he was here already.

"Huh?" he mouthed, puzzled, Shippo supressed his laughter and walked into the hut.

"Good luck Kohaku" he said "You may need it".

It was now just me and Kohaku standing outside my hut, "R-Rin what are you talking about?" he sturrered. I huffed at him and stamped my foot.

"You keep talking about me, not to me! It's like I'm just an object…a package you wanna dump off as soon as possible! Do you remember that once…once you actually cared about me and would never have been so cold" I paused allow him saturate what I had already said "you've been here a matter of hours and managed to make me furious with you! If I really am _such_ a burden then go back to that village and I'll make my own way to Lord Sesshomaru! You lighten up or get lost!" I stormed into my hut leaving him slack jawed, with nothing to say.

I don't think I ever yelled at him before…this was going to be a _long_ trip and I have no idea what was going to happen. Thank god Shippo was going to be with us!


	3. So it begins

**Chapter 3**

**So it begins **

Kohaku's POV 

"Sango, we have to get going" I said to her she still clung tightly, I remember her being so much taller than me…now I towered over her.

"I know" she whispered, "but last time I let you go…you didn't come back for four years…in which time you got engaged and settled down". Her voice was starting to break, I held her tighter…I never knew our mother…Sango took over the role, she was both mother and sister. In my absence she had birthed a child and had another on the way. She wasn't far gone in her pregnancy…she wasn't even showing yet…I had a feeling it was going to be a girl.

"Sister…this is my last mission…I intend to settle in my new village, I'm working a blacksmith…I'm getting married, I'm going to raise a family. It's you that made me want this life, you made me want to leave my demon slaying days behind…I want what you have here" I told her, clasping her hands in mine.

She looked up at me, her brow knitted and chewing at her lower lip "but are you certain this woman is who you want to build this life with…I always that…that you'd, choose someone else…" her gaze fell on Rin who was hugging Kagome goodbye, Shippo was saying goodbye to Inuyasha.

I couldn't take my eyes off Rin…she was wearing Sango's demon slayer uniform, but instead of pink and red upon the tight black suit she wore yellow and orange, the colour of the sun. Sango had apparently made it for as an eighteenth birthday present. It clung to her womanly curves…she was mesmerising! Even Shippo's jaw dropped at the sight of her. My sister snapped her fingers in front of my face "hey, focus!" she snapped "just think about it…this lifestyle you want…it only works out if it's with someone you truly love…please take time to think about this".

I sighed and released Sango, she didn't even know Suzu…his sister was always protective and she risked so much so that he could live…she always said she saved my life so she could live it…I'm not a kid anymore, its time she let me go. As Sango moved on to bud her farewells to her former companion Kirara I was approached by Miroku.

"She means well" he told me, referring to my sister "she sacrificed a lot to have you in her life…don't wait another four years to come back. There are two places in her heart I cannot fill, one is her children…the other is you".

Great! Last thing I wanted was a damn lecture! I know how much Sango sacrificed for me and not a day goes by that I don't love her more for it, but come on! BACK OFF ALREADY!

"Hey Kohaku!" Shippo hollered "you were the one who was in such hurry to leave, come on let's get moving".

I hopped on Kirara leaving my sister with one last kiss upon her cheek before she walked tearfully into her hut, her husband following close behind.

"Rin" I called, "get on".

She scowled at me, clearly I was still not forgiven, though I'm still uncertain of exactly what I did wrong, she huffed at me and held up her head, "I think I'll stick with Shippo actually" she retorted "…is that okay with you Shippo?"

Shippo looked her up and down again admiring her appearance "that is _more _than okay with me dear lady". Rin rolled her eyes and shook her head, laughing fondly at her fox friend. She climbed onto to his back and wrapped her legs around his waist…something inside me cringed at this. I gripped at the weapon Totosai had forged for me and grimaced.

At that moment my two nieces came running out crying "Shippo! Shippo won't you stay with us a little longer!" Yuka pleaded.

"Yes, and will you ever return to us soon my good fox demon?" Yuki pouted clasping her hands together.

Shippo turned them with a face similar to that of my brother-in-law's when he was approached by beautiful women, "do not fear my dears" he began with a soft tone "I will return when you are both women and then I shall attend to each of your-"

"-SHIPPO!" Miroku yelled making a sudden appearance; he was racing towards the fox demon with his staff.

With an alarmed face Shippo stuttered "UH! G-gotta go now, bye…_Transform_!" with that last part he turned into a magnificent giant bird, his great wings swooped and took flight with Rin laughing joyfully with excitement and Miroku yelling up at him and threatening him…again I snorted with annoyance.

"So it begins" I sighed.

* * *

Rin's POV

"You make a good Eagle Shippo" I complemented ruffling the feathers atop his head.

"I'm a Hawk!" he whined.

Soon we were joined by Kohaku…_great, now my good moods gone_! Why was I acting like this? Why was I _really _so angry at him?

"Uh Shippo…you realise that West is that way…right?" he said pointing in the opposite direction.

"Uh…yeah, yeah…just wanted to make sure you were paying attention…especially if you're the one leading this thing" he responded turning the right way.

"Or rather you panicked and flew in whichever direction because Miroku was about to break your head open" I shot back, the three of us laughed (including Kohaku) I quickly realised laughing with him was not a good way to stay made so I quickly ceased and narrowed my eyes at him_, Laughing with me! What a jerk!_

We flew most of the way in silence, Shippo doing most of the talking; It had been so long since I flew, I almost forgot how much I loved being up in the clouds, Ah-Un came to mind…how I missed tending to him. I'd see all my former travelling companions again…but a small part of me would miss that village, after all I had spent the majority of my life there. However, I belonged with Lord Sesshomaru…I vowed to forever serve him and love him as my guardian and protector.

"Shippo" Kohaku called, _interrupting my thoughts, how rude hmph_! "Make sure to keep your eyes peeled…we are hovering over bandit country".

"Bandits!" I near screamed…horrible memories came flooding back…I held in a great cry and gripped at Shippo's feathers.

"OW! OW! Rin my feathers are attached to me!" he screeched, I softened and apologised but still I trembled with fear. Bandits are the most evil things in world! I hate them…they're so terrifying! I don't care what anyone says…bandits are way worse than demons!

Kohaku flew closer to us "It's okay Rin…we're pretty high so they may not even see us" he soothed, I immediately felt better, his face was so warm and comforting…_just like that day when we kissed_. I found myself doing exactly what I promised I wouldn't…I smiled with gratitude.

However, this tender moment was quickly interrupted by an arrow shooting up at us, missing Shippo by an inch! As he dodged out of the way I fell from his back, plummeting toward the earth! A loud shrilling screamed resounded throughout the sky as I fell "Lord Sesshomaru!" I cried as if by some instinct.

"Rin!" I heard Kohaku shout then someone grabbing my arm…it was him! Kohaku pulled me up onto Kirara and into his arms, I was too overwhelmed to realise that I was so close to him. "Shippo are you alright? We've been spotted" he yelled to our fox friend.

Shippo sneered and narrowed his eyes, "I'll get'em!" he then sored down to attack.

"Shippo no!" I squawked outstretching my arm and almost falling again, Kohaku pulled me back."Kohaku…we have to go down and help him! There's no way Shippo can take all those bandits by himself!"

"Don't underestimate him Rin, I promised to keep you safe, I'm not flying down into that kind of danger with you here!"

"Do it Kohaku!"

"No!"

"I mean it!"

"Rin I said no! Shippo will be fine!"

"DO IT! Or I swear I'll jump!"

With an exasperated grunt Kohaku swooped Kirara down "FINE!" He yelled, _please be safe Shippo_.

We reached the ground, surrounded by high cliffs, Kohaku and I stood back to back, weapons ready (Sango gave me her sword before we left, despite the fact that I have no idea how to use it!). Kirara was also at the ready, Shippo and she were old friends, if anything happened to him she would all psycho kitty on who ever harmed him.

"Rin…I want you to hide" Kohaku told me steadily trying not to be so loud.

"No!" I retorted, he tensed and again gave a grunt of annoyance, I was so much more obedient as a child.

"Rin…I told you to hide now do it!" he growled, I simpered at him from over my shoulder.

"And I told _you_ no so back off! I will not cower while you and Shippo risk your lives!" I shot back with furious determination, he didn't respond.

It was quiet…too quiet, eyes suddenly peered from the darkness between the rocks and we were surrounded by bandits, there were so many of them. "Hey girly" one said to me, leering at my chest "wanna lay with a _real _man tonight?"

I grimaced in disgust, Kohaku turned and pulled me behind him "we're just passing through…we have no valuables for you to take so you're wasting your time here!" he snarled, they laughed.

The same bandit who I would presume was the leader, "I wouldn't say that…I'd pay a fortune for that little lady your hiding there…hand her over and we'll let you pass through".

I cowered behind Kohaku…I thought I could face this fear, but I couldn't these men terrified me far too much for I had witness first hand, what they were capable of. I felt the muscles in Kohaku's arms tense up.

"You want her? Come and get her…but you'll have to go through me first!" with those last words from Kohaku a fight broke out, he swung his weapon with masterful skill. He did not let go of me the entire time, he swirled me into his hold , shielding me and when he flipped and bounced from wall to wall, he carried me with him effortlessly. Suddenly moe appeared, there too many of them! One wrenched me away from Kohaku.

"RIN!" he yelled trying to grab me back but we held back by a swarm of bandits, they had unarmed him and now he fought fist to fist to try and reach me.

The man who had grabbed me removed my sword from hand with ease, I kicked and struggled against him. He was tall and lean, not at as broad as Kohaku but still his form was manly. His hair was short, black and unkempt…he was altogether a ruggedly handsome guy aside from an ugly scar that ran down the side of his face.

"You let me go!" I sneered through gritted teeth, "You will regret whatever it is you're about to do! Lord Sesshomaru!"

"Hang on!" he said almost defensively pulling me further and further away from the scuffle with the same lithe movements as Kohaku. This boy, no older than twenty was well trained, no ordinary badit moved like him.

"FOX FIRE!" Came a voice that lifted my spirits, Shippo appeared suddenly before us, green flames shooting from his claws. The young bandit ducked down from the flames, _shielding me…was he protecting me?_

"Take your hands off her!" Shippo growled, his foot connected with the bandits chin and sent him flying.

He crashed into the wall of a cliff and breathlessly spoke holding out his arm "Wait! I was just trying to-".

"Save it! Don't waste your breath you son of a-"

"-Shippo wait!" I ordered holding back his fist, I looked over at the young boy…he didn't seem evil to me.

"Who are you? What exactly are you trying to do?" I demanded, he looked up with soft, serious eyes.

"H-help you" he replied "I was trying to get you out of here so your demon buddy could help your other friends!"

Shippo and I looked over our shoulders, Kohaku was struggling and they had pinned Kirara down with chains! Shippo cracked his claws, Kirara was someone not to be messed with!

"Fine!" I said Shippo shook his head in bewilderment, "you wanna help? Help me save my friends!" with that I charged at the bandits approaching us, picking up and swinging my sword frantically hoping to get _some_ use out of it! I could feel Shippo and that young man staring after me in surprise.

"You heard the lady!" said Shippo dragging him up by the collar "Help us or die!" my fox demon then lept forward using his claws and fox fire to fight. He created illusions of snakes, five of the bandits laid on the floor struggling actually believing they were being strangled by snakes.

The young man joined us and started fighting against his own men, "Norio? What are you doing?" one of victims barked in shock, Norio as they called him glared at him.

"This is for my brother!" he spat back and ended the bandit's life there. Shippo had freed Kirara….I ran to Kohaku's aid it was down to just him and two others. He took down one of them but the other seemed to be more of a challenge. Kohaku was being strangled...but before I could reach him I was again taken by their leader. The light was fading out of Kohaku's eyes…I could see it and I was powerless to help! To my extreme delight Norio again emerged and aided Kohaku who was shocked to find that one of the bandits had helped him, but without words they came to an understanding.

"FOX FIRE!" Came Shippo's voice again, he set the leader aflame and pulled me up on Kirara. We flew to where Norio and Kohaku stood, still fighting of another group of me.

"We haven't got time for this! Get on!" Shippo yelled taking Kohaku by the hand and dragging him up, I did the same with Norio.

We quickly swooped down and retrieved our weapons before flying higher into the sky at an incredible speed. "this is too much weight for Kirara" Shippo said noticing her strugglem he looked to Norio, "you come with me…_Transform_!" he then turned into a Hawk, carrying Norio on his back.

"Cool, a Condor" he said being quite impressed… "Nice bow too, blue…very manly" he teased.

"Give it a rest!" Shippo grumbled "Or I'll throw you to your _comrades_ back there".

Norio frowned, there something so sad about him…I wonder how he got that scar…didn't I hear him mention a brother?

"We'll fly on a few more miles and make then find somewhere to make camp" said Kohaku, I realised I was again riding with him, my hands wrapped around his waist. He looked questioningly at Norio "You've got a _lot_ of explaining to do mister"…


	4. Whatever bandit boy

**Chapter 4**

**Whatever bandit boy**

Kohaku's POV

We settled down in far off forest, I had built a fire which Shippo lit with is magic "right men" the fox demon said clapping his hands together "let's hunt for food!"

"It's okay Shippo" Rin's voiced chimed in, so musically she emerged from the darkness of the trees with an armful of vegetables and freshly caught fish. Still the same forager I befriended all those years ago. My mouth watered for the taste of watermelon.

"I'll teach you how to you use a bow and arrow" I said place the fish on stick and around the fire so they could cook "maybe then you can catch us larger animals to eat".

Rin shook her head "Don't worry, Norio has already promised to do that".

On the note Shippo and I turned our narrow gazes to him, time for interrogation "so" I began "Tell us…why should we trust you? You turned on your own men…you say you want to follow us, give us one good reason why we should let you".

Norio shifted uncomfortably "Because I hate those men! I never wanted this life for myself" he divulged, we all sat patiently for the rest to be explained; "when I was eight…my mother and father were killed by those men" he stopped when a whimper came from Rin, clearly reliving her own traumatic experience, I resisted the urge to wrap my arm around her shoulders…it may give her the wrong idea plus I knew Suzu would not appreciate it. Norio continued "they took me and my twin, Nori, and trained us to be like them. We came from a village of ninjas they wanted to use the skills we already possessed for their raids. We had no choice…it was either do as we're told or be killed and Nori wasn't much of fighter…I had to protect him. However, I noticed my twin begin to change, he became fierce and brutal…hearting any innocent who got in the way of what he wanted. Two months ago I tried to stop him…he was trying to take someone's wife with them, he snatched her child from her arms and threw it on the ground…he killed her husband. I tried to remind him of what we went through, how we lost our parents to bandits and that he should not inflict such a fate on this child…I told him to let the mother go, or I would make him! Unfortuantley, my brother was long gone, in his place a horrid man, a monster created by those men that took us and I hated them all the more for it! Nori began to fight me…he left me with this scar" Norio traced the scar with his fingertips…I thought of the scar on Sango's back and shivered with sickness. "I laid almost lifeless on the ground…he pulled the woman up by her hair and held his blade to her throat "we are who we are now brother" he said to me "If I can't have this woman for the night…then no man will ever touch her again"…before he slit her throat I mustered enough strength to stop him…my blade went straight through his stomach….I killed him".

Now that was something I could relate to…images of that day when I possessed filled my mind…I clenched my fists together an unbearable pain in my chest. A soft hand laid on mine, looking up, it was Rin…she wasn't looking at me though…her stern face was gazing at Norio "You didn't kill him" she uttered gently "clearly your brother died long before you stuck your blade into that monster!"

Norio scoffed "I try to tell myself that everyday…that I had no choice! Ever since I've been looking fo a way out…then you guys appeared, then I saw them try and take Rin…I remembered that young woman's face and I couldn't let them take her…or any of you" he stopped and checked all of our faces "you see I have nowhere else to go…just let me travel with you till I find a place to settle".

We were all thinking long and hard, from the moment I met him…when he saved me from a strangle, I trusted him…all three of us had lost our family to a certain evil…he was already one of us.

"We'd be glad to have you join us" Rin spoke first, she rose to her feet and sat beside Norio and laid a hand on his shoulder "Norio…I think you'll fit right in" she smiled, he blushed furiously…if only Rin knew what an affect she had on men…

* * *

Norio and Shippo were talking over something ridiculous, "please I've been with way more women then you!" Norio scoffed,

"Nu-uh! How many!" Shippo goaded pointing his finger at him.

Again Norio scoffed "A lot okay…a gentleman does not brag about his previous conquests…those poor women are already so heartbroken over my absence, I would not cause them further sadness by breaking the implied confidentiality of our relationships".

Shippo's eyes were wide wit aggravation "yeah right! You're a liar!"

As they continued bickering I noticed Rin and Kirara were nowhere in sight, I told the other guys I was going to look for them, but they were too busy arguing on whether Norio was a liar or not.

"Hey not the tail! Nobody pulls the tail and lives!" was the last thing I heard Shippo yell before I disappeared into the trees…

Rin's POV

I sighed as I sat by the stream, I probably shouldn't have strayed so far from the others…but It'd be okay, after all Kirara was with me, I scratched the two-tailed creature behind the ear as she curled up next to me in her tiny form.

"Lord Sesshomaru…I hope I see you soon" I sighed bringing my knees to my chest and wrapping my arms around them.

"Rin…can I join you?" Kohaku asked appearing at my side, he was so quiet I didn't even hear him coming.

"I- I guess so" I responded, he sat next to me…closer than I would have liked why am I blushing…_it's not like I have crush on him anymore!_

"Thinking of Lord Sesshomaru?"

I nodded "Yes…I wish he'd of just come and got me himself…I can't stand that I've put you all in such danger…and that I'm too weak and pathetic to even pull my weight!"

"What are you talking about!" Kohaku exclaimed "Rin you went into that battle swinging your sword without a clue how to use it…you put yourself in danger because you care about us…Rin…you are pulling your weight, you're not weak or pathetic…you are one of the bravest and most strongest people I know. That's why we are so willing to protect you…you are too good to lose, you're someone worth caring for, worth risking life for…even Norio knew that the instant he met you. I would do anything to keep you safe…one of the reasons I took on this mission was because…because I missed you, I missed you every day I was gone and leapt at the chance to see you again".

Why did he have to be so good with words! Damn that man! Why did he have to make my heart melt with so much flattery! _Stop toying with me you ape_! I discovered his arm around my shoulder….by a stream, his arm around me…comforting me, this scene was too familiar. I recalled our last parting, how he promised to come back and then kissed me. He kissed and came back four years later betrothed to someone else! I had every right to be angry! I slapped his arm away and pushed him.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" I yelled at him, he recoiled with a befuddled expression. "You can't say those things to me! If you missed me so much then why did it take you so long to come back? It hurt that you didn't come back…it hurt me, it hurt your sister and everyone else who cares about you! I was waiting for you! Did you know that? I waited four years for you to come back!"

Silence filled the air, Kohaku had been rendered speechless by my words "R-Rin…" was all he could manage. I was on my feet standing a few feet away from him, I could feel his eyes watching me…I refused face him. "Rin…I'm sorry".

"Save it!" I snapped "I don't want to hear it! You kissed me…do you remember that…you kissed me then promised to come back! I hang around for four years waiting for you to come back…when you do…you announce that you're getting married! Did you not think what that would do to me? Did you think of me at all while you off falling on love with her?"

I faced him now, _let him see my tears, let him see all __the hurt he has caused me_!

"Rin…. I-"

"-I told you to save it!" I interrupted, "Marry Suzu if you really want….forget all about me, you've obviously done it before you can certainly do it again. I can't wait for this to be over so I can get as far away from you as possible….I hate you Kohaku! I hate you and I just want this journey to be over!" I ran from him…he called out for me but I did not obey! I've never really hated anyone in my life…I didn't mean it, I don't hate him…I only hate the fact that I cannot have him…

Shippo's POV

"Wow" Norio uttered, that was he could say…I was speechless…we had just witnessed the argument between Kohaku and Rin…this was going to be the most awkward journey. I was reminded of my former traveling companions, how much tension there was back then whenever Inuyasha had upset Kagome…this was going to be so much worse! "that was pretty…intense".

"I can't believe Kohaku did this to Rin!" I chided, I was so angry for my friend and I expected better of Kohaku.

"Would be it be completely inappropriate if I asked to take his place? Rin is indeed a fine looking woman " Norio wondered aloud, I bonked him on the head "Ow! Why'd you to that!"

"Rin is my friend, they both are, but Rin especially…the last thing she needs is some pervert drooling all over her" I yelled at him

"I was just joking!"

I rolled my eyes, completely unconvinced "Whatever bandit boy".

We looked to the scene again, Kohaku watched out for her even though she was long gone…he looked someone had given cold, harsh slap round the face. I wonder where Rin went.

"Shippo?" came a broken voice, it was Rin, _oh god she know we were spying! She's gonna kill me!_

I was shocked when instead of being angry with me, she ran into my arms sobbing, seeking comfort. I held my friend closely, Norio watched on with sympathy.

"It's okay Rin…it'll all be okay" I soothed.

"No it won't" she sobbed into my clothes "I don't hate him Shippo, I don't …it would be just so much easier if I did".

We were quiet and allowed her to get most of her crying done before bidding it was time we returned to camp.

"I have some gold" Norio said kindly as he stood beside Rin, "tomorrow we'll sleep in an inn…it's the least I can do"

Rin smiled with gratitude, Norio was actually a pretty nice guy…for a former bandit any way "if we're lucky they'll be serving some _sake!__" _he added cheerfully, oh kami…a perv and a drunkard all in one…this should at least be interesting.


	5. my head hurts!

Chapter 5

My head hurts!

Kohaku's POV

I felt like the biggest jerk in the world….there are two people in my life who I never want to hurt and that is Sango…and Rin, I managed to hurt them both countless times. Her voice rang in my ears, did you think of me at all? Of course I did! Every damn day and in truth I wasn't out falling in love, I care about Suzu, but I don't love her. I can't love anyone…I don't deserve to, though I have tried to atone for my previous sins…I can't full escape the guilt…if anything good happens in the future it is alreay tainted by my past.

Suzu knows nothing of my past that's why it's easier to be around her, I'm happy but not too happy that I start to feel sick. I was so happy with Rin, so happy that it hurt. That day we kissed I felt so much joy I could weep, that's why I had to leave so quickly and felt like I couldn't come back. Suzu was the closest to happiness I allowed myself to come.

Rin wasn't speaking to me the next morning, you'd cut the tension with a knife! We decided to give Kirara a rest and so we went on foot with me carrying her. Shippo lulled at the back with Rin while Norio and I were up front.

"You should talk to her" he said to walking as though he didn't have a care in the world, his hands behind his head.

"I really don't think that's a good idea….she really hates me" I responded sadly.

"No she doesn't" he chuckled "she has every right to, but she doesn't …tell me what has this Suzu got that Rin doesn't? You guys seem perfect together".

I sighed, _why can't we just drop this_! "whatever you think is going on with me and Rin….it's not, we had a moment four years ago and that's it, nothing more…I refuse to betray Suzu's trust".

Norio scoffed "looks like you've already done that brother…you can tell just by looking at the two of you that there's something there….stop being such a misery and let yourself be happy for once".

"I don't deserve to!"

"And what about what she deserves?" he snapped at me, I quickly checked over my shoulder, she was still out of ear shot, Norio continued "Have you even thought about what makes her happy? Ever think it might be you? Ever think that it's okay to be happy if it's in making someone else so? You've told me all about your past and it's time you moved on! You've been given another shot of life…live it!"

We pressed onward till Norio was complaining about being hungry, "you humans are so weak! Unlike we demons, Kirara and I can go days without food or sleep" Shippo chimed in smugly.

"I'm pretty hungry too, if we stop for a moment I can find us something quick and easy to eat along the way" Rin spoke up, it was the first time she had spoken all day. I was so glad to hear her speak that I didn't want to say anything in case I ruined it.

"No need" Shippo said pointing onwards, "there's a village up ahead we can eat there!"

"Great! No more weird mushrooms, or whatever else Rin digs up" Norio cheered enthusiastically.

We hastened quickly towards the village to find utter chaos, some kind of bear demon was attacking them, they ran like headless chickens!

"Everyone get inside!" I ordered, "Don't come out until it's over!" They all did as I commanded, it was just us and the demon, Rin readied her sword.

"Rin this is no place for you! Get inside with the villagers!" I yelled, she ignored me, it was as though I hadn't even spoken. _Fine be that way_!

The demon turned to us, blood on his claws! I was the first to attack…Shippo followed close behind, Norio hesitated, he clearly hadn't much experience in demon slaying. Eventually he and Rin charged.

The great bear's claw dropped down almost hitting Rin, I dived in and dodged her out the way my, I had scooped her up, at first she seemed relieved till she saw it was me that saved and struggled wordlessly away. Shippo was doing well, he was using all his demonic skill attacking the creature, even Norio was putting up a good fight. "Shippo!" I called urgently to him, his kicked the monster in his jaw, "get Rin out of here!"

He raced to Rin and swept her up, carrying her away.

"No!" I heard her argue "Shippo go back! They need your fire…that's the demon's weakness, go back they need you!"

He was torn but he had to admit she was right, he set her down and told her to stay there, maybe she'd listen to him and stay out of sight.

"Let's go Kirara!" I jumped on her back and charged, I threw my blade "Now Shippo! Use your fire!"

He did as I requested and shot his green flames setting my blade alight. As it sliced through the demon, Norio kicked it guts for one final blow. The demon was vanquished it destruction followed by peace.

"Is everyone okay?" Rin yelled sprinting towards us, she noticed Norio was scathed at the arm and gasped "you're hurt!" she exclaimed.

He shrugged it off "I've received worse".

The villagers came pouring out, cheering and clapping, the headman greeted us, lifting my arm in the air, "let's hear it for our heroes!" he bellowed. How they cheered.

One of the pretty village girls approached Norio p, practically throwing Rin out of the way "let me see to that wound shall we?" she said linking her arms around his, she smiled devilishly.

"Well if you insist" he responded happily.

I looked round to see a whole heap of women surrounding Shippo "won't you show us more of your fox magic?" the pleaded girlishly, he was loving the attention.

The headman grabbed my shoulders "You will stay with us for as long as you like! Tonight we feast…everyone prepare food and drink for these people…tonight we celebrate!" the headman then turned to Rin "you will sit by my son, he would be honoured to have you next to him" he took her by the hand, Rin blushed and something in me raged, I couldn't explain why, it burned fiercely when she happily accepted his offer.

* * *

Rin's POV

There was music! We ate like royalty then gathered in the town square, surrounding a great big fire clapping our hands a dancing to the music.

"Let the _sake_ flow!" Norio roared waving his arms in the air, he was joined by a crowed of cheers and a girl with a whole jug of the liquid he required, she poured it into his mouth.

Shippo was dazzling a crowd with his illusions, his favourite trick was the duplication he put a sheet over someone, when he pulled it off it was another him standing there instead. He conjured rainbows and all other kinds of magic.

I have to admit even I was amazed by it.

The headman's son, Toru, approached me with the same drink "here, but don't drink too many" he warned playfully, he was quite handsome I must say and very intelligent. This was my second round of _sake_, Lord Sesshomaru would not be happy with me if he knew I had been drinking.

"Rin" Kohaku said firmly, _he just appears out nowhere__! _"Make sure that's your last".

That is exactly what I intended to do, but now that it came as an order from him, I wanted to defy it! I swallowed down the contents, it burned a little, "Toru" I cooed girlishly, "may I have another?".

"Right away miss Rin" he obliged, Kohaku narrowed his eyes at me.

"You're going to make a fool of yourself if you carry on like this" he warned.

I scoffed "I think I already did that…for four years then again the other night, who cares what I do now!"

Toru returned with my drink, I took that down in one gulp also, looking Kohaku straight in the face I uttered "Toru, can I have another?"

Kohaku just walked away and went back to his corner still watching me as I laughed with Toru.

The night drew on with more merriment, Norio stumbled over to me "I'm never ever leaving!" he slurred "I'm going to marry her…then her….then her…then her….the you…then her" he was pointing a various girls, when I realised one of them was me I slapped his hand away laughing.

Everything was moving…I felt all my inhibitions fly away.

"Go for it Norio!" I slurred stumbling a little, he caught me and returned me to my balance "I mean it you're a great guy…you could have them all begging for you!" We laughed stupidly and high-fived.

"Shippo and I have a bet!" he whispered to me "we propose to all these girls and whoever gets the most yeses wins!"

I laughed and clapped my hands, "how many you got?" I asked he held up both his hands, ten! He staggered off. I fell back; I almost hit the ground till I felt someone's arms around me.

"Are you okay Miss Rin?" asked Toru, his arms about my waist, I wrapped mine about his neck and hugged him.

"You're so nice!" I cajoled then released him, he seemed amazed "hey…do you like watermelons? How about carrots? I don't like carrots but I like that they're orange….what are your thoughts on flowers?"

"You do talk a lot don't you…why is that?"

I swayed unstably, he held me up "You didn't answer any of my questions….how about this one, do you think I'm pretty?"

His eyes blinked "b-beautiful Miss Rin, you're completely beautiful".

My eyes started welling up with tears, this is what I wanted Kohaku to say "then why didn't he want me?" I began cry, releasing my drunken tears "what makes her so special? I've been there through everything…but he still didn't want me! No one ever has!" I clung to him.

"I-I want you…Miss Rin" he stuttered, I looked up at him, his eyes so sincere…he did want me and it felt nice. He wiped the tears from my cheeks, then cupped my face. I had only ever kissed one person, he was now betrothed. Toru's face leaned in…he was going to kiss me! My eyes gently closed as his lips inched closer to mine. He was so close, I felt his warmth…suddenly he was wrenched away. I opened my eyes to see that it was Kohaku that pulled him away, he held him up by the collar, and his feet weren't touching the ground.

"What the hell are you doing!" he snarled at Toru, who was shaking with fear.

"N-nothing" he stuttered "…I was just-"

"-Taking advantage of her!" Kohaku finished his sentence for him "does she look able to make good decisions right now? You should have backed off, now I'm gonna tear you apart!"

"What's going on" Shippo his words fumbled incoherently from his mouth as he stumbled to the scene his snake toy hanging from his shoulders and rouge kiss marks all over his face. We were soon joined by Norio.

"Hey people…what's with all the animosity?" he garbled with a huge grin.

Kohaku didn't take his eyes off Toru, "this guy was all over Rin!"

Norio and Shippo sneered at Toru "you dirty punk!" Shippo snarled, clicking his claws.

"I'm gonna tear you limb from limb!" Norio added.

They all began crowding him "No please it's not true!" he yelped

"Liar!" his three attackers accuse.

I had to step in, "he's not a liar I yelled over them, trying to push them away from him.

"Don't defend this jerk Rin!" Kohaku shouted

"I'm not" I yelled, getting their attention "I was the one all over _him_!"

They all stopped and looked at me with disappointed expression, Kohaku released Toru who quickly fled to safety. All three pairs of eyes were on me, shame burned at my cheeks…their arms were folded.

"Do you know how dangerous that is Rin?" Shippo lectured

Norio had to join with "yeah, have some self-respect!"

Now I was angry! "Hey, back off! How was what I was doing any different from what you two were doing?"

I had them stumped, they were trying to explain what the difference was between them flirting and me flirting (Kohaku was sulking through most of it) when an angry villager.

"The fox demon kissed my wife!" he yelled pointing at Shippo, they were soon joined a mob.

One pointed to Norio "The one with the scar proposed to my daughters, all three of them!"

Another pointed to Kohaku "and he attacked the headman's son".

Finally their judgment fell on me "that little wench seduced him! It was all a plan to lure him into a trap!"

My companions I at first could not move, five minutes ago all these people adored us…now they looked like they were going to kill us!

"Uh I think it's time we left" Shippo uttered to us.

"Agreed!" the rest of us said in unison, Kohaku grabbed my hand and we all started running, the angry villagers close behind.

"No don't hurt my fox!" one of the village girls cried out "Shippo I'll wait for you!"

He blew her a kiss, _really not helping us, just rubbing salt in the wound_!

Kohaku summoned Kirara, he pulled himself and me onto her, Shippo transformed, carrying Norio, "Shippo you're too drunk to fly" I warned.

"_You're_ too drunk to fly" he sputtered as we took flight, leaving the angry mob behind. We took cover in a nearby forest; when we had settled we breathed heavily ad collapsed to the ground. Laughter broke out among us, Kirara was definatley not amused. I looked around to see Shippo was missing, we started yelling for him.

"I'm up here!" he muffled…he had flown into a tree, it took all three of us and Kirara to get him down.

Kohaku (as the only sober one) built a fire and the rest of us leaned against Kirara. "I hope you realise how stupid drinking is now" he said, _here comes the lecture_. "you made yourselves look like fools and embarrassed yourselves completely.

"I'm not embarrassed" Norio denied, "how about you Shipp?"

"Nope…Rin?"

"Nope!"

"Well you should!" Kohaku exploded, annoyed that he wasn't getting through to us.

At first we were taken aback by aggression, then decided to laugh it off hysterically, "Lighten up Kohaku! You're way too serious!" Shippo chuckled.

"Yeah we actually learnt a lot tonight" Norio said putting his arm around both mine and Shippo's shoulders, "for one, I can get more girls to say yes to marriage than Shippo , two Shippo has thing for married women and finally…Rin is a little vixen! Behind that innocent façade beats the fiery heart of a temptress!"

Shippo and I giggled like children, Kohaku certainly looked unmoved…not even a _hint _of a smile. "Whatever…just sleep it off okay, we gotta get moving, we're wasting too much time with all this".

Like naughty children we drunkards stayed up later, giggling amongst each other quietly so not to wake Kohaku or "the fun slayer" as Norio called him. Shipp even transformed into his image and mimicked him; "You all made fools of yourselves! You should be ashamed!"

This had me and Norio rolling with laughter, we then found out that Shippo was only one girl away from tying the bet with Norio.

An Idea struck him, he took me by the hands, "dear Rin, will you marry me…then let me see other women behind your back?" he asked, I held my hand to my heart.

"Shippo!" I breathed "I'd be honoured! Yes…a thousand times Yes!"

He stood to his feet and raised his hands in the air "that's it! It's a tie!"

"No!" Norio groaned "Rin you damn traitor how could you!"

That night we laughed ourselves to sleep….

* * *

The morning came, Kohaku threw cold water on us…we woke in a fright. "The sun!" Shippo groaned "it burns!"

"My head hurts!" I whined.

"Get up!" Kohaku ordered grouchily "I'm not slowing down because you guys are being idiots!" he stormed off.

"Someone's not happy" Norio noted, helping me to my feet.

Shippo nodded, "yeah jealousy runs in the family…you should see his sister, Rin do us all a favour…no more hitting on ridiculously handsome men!"

I buried my face in my hands and groaned, _never again…I will never touch a drop of sake ever again for as long as I live!_


	6. Be brave and say it

**Chapter 6**

**Be brave and say it!**

Shippo's POV

What is wrong with these two? It's so obvious that they care about each other, Kohaku was watching her like a hawk when we were all drinking. I remember him coming up to me and asking "_Toru isn't that good looking is he_?"

I checked the guy out, Rin certainly thought he was, with a shrug of shoulders I replied "_honestly__, yeah he's a great looking guy, Rin could do worse_"

I got such a dirty look for him and I stuttered to make it right "_then again she could do better_" ten minutes later we saw him holding Toru up by the collar. I wish I didn't have to deal with all these stupid love triangles again, I thought we were over all that…Kagome and Inuyasha were married as was Sango and Miroku, it all worked out for them as I knew it would. I wasn't too sure about Kohaku and Rin though, he was so hell-bent on getting back to Suzu and Rin was about ready to destroy anything that came between her and Sesshomaru. What neither of seemed to want to admit, was that they would be so much happier if they just…stayed together.

We were flying, Rin refused to join Kohaku on Kirara and so I was carrying her while he flew with Norio. Most of the way was silent, Kohaku wasn't talking to any of us, he was still angry with us for our previous indiscretions.

We were still heading west when he finally spoke "My village is not far up ahead, can we stop?"

"But the demon slayer village is north" I said a little confused, Rin gripped at my feathers_, ow, ow…that hurts!_

"He meant his new village, the one he lives in with his lady love" she corrected me in a bitter tone. I had never seen Rin like this, she was always so nice and cheerful…she picked flowers, stroked bunnies. Now in her moods she was trampling those flowers and since Norio was teaching her artery she was bringing back those bunnies for dinner. Kohaku had taken away a lot of her joy, only Sesshomaru could fix her now.

I watched as Kohaku tensed up "I promised Suzu okay! It'll only before a couple of days".

I didn't respond, no one did…_well, this is awkward_ is said internally.

* * *

"Kohaku's back!" the village children cheered as they approached him, "Someone get Suzu"

I readied myself to meet Kohaku's future bride, I decided to back up Rin…if she hated her, I hated her, even though by the way Kohaku described her, she sounded like a ton of fun.

"I bet she's a dog" I whispered to Rin who looked so nervous, she giggled quietly and playfully whacked my arm, telling me not to be so mean. But she needed to hear that, it made her feel a lot better.

Norio put his arm around her in a comradely manner "Yeah, bet she's fat too".

"Kohaku!" A sweet and musically voiced echoed, we all turned to see the most unique beauty, her soft and brown hair flowing in thick long waves…her eyes were green, like mine. The scent produced from alabaster skin was glorious, it was something so familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. She had freckles on the bridge of her nose, the kind you can see flecked across the petal of a lily flower. In truth I was completely mesmerised…she was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen, fun and excitement oozed from her…I was so happy just by looking at her, her smile was infectious. Her body was petite and slender, not as curvaceous as Rin, but magnificent in her own way.

"Uh…see, totally fat, complete dog" Norio whispered, what a liar not even I could back up Rin now

Suzu sauntered gracefully towards Kohaku, "You're back, the villagers missed you" she hugged him closely, by some instinct Rin took my hand for comfort…strangely, I found myself needing comfort, I hadn't even uttered a word to this girl, yet already I was angered by her hugging Kohaku, her betrothed for _Kam_i sake! Was I jealous? Why was I jealous?

"Come on" Kohaku said to her, holding her gently by the arms, "I want to introduce you to my friends" he turned to us, she smiled beautifully "this is Norio….this is Rin" Rin forced herseflt to smile pleasantly.

"Hey it's nice to meet you, you really are as lovely as Kohaku described you" she said_, easy Rin don't over do it._

Eventually they stopped at me, her eyes widened at me for a moment, then she beamed from ear to ear, I could hear her heartbeat race, "H-hello" she stuttered "you are"

"Shippo" I held out my hand and took hers, there was a jolt of some kind of electricity…an incredible pool, it was exhilarating.

"You're a fox demon! You'll have to show me some of your tricks" she said, Kohaku mention that she liked magic, magic and pranks were her two favourite things…this was going to be _awful!_

* * *

Rin's POV

Oh Kami she was beautiful! Ah…and _so_ nice, she noticed the demon slaying outfit Sango made me was dirty, so she leant me one of her most loveliest Kimonos while she washed it for me. The fabric was so soft "I picked out yellow, I thought it suited you, it has a white flower pattern" she said as she handed it to me, she then gave a little gasp of excitement "there are some white flowers growing outside! Can I put them in our hair? You'll look so lovely!"

"Uh…sure, that would be really nice of you" I responded, she set me down on a stool and began combing through my hair. She was asking me questions about my comfort, like did I enjoy my bath? Was my bed comfortable enough? Did I want some more tea?

Kohaku didn't mention just how sweet she really was, she was someone I could actually be friends with. Suzu was another person it would be so much easier for me to hate, but I couldn't bring myself to, she was actually really funny too.

"Done!" she declared handing me a mirror, _great she's creative too, my hair has never looked this good_! "Do you like it?"

I nodded my head, she squealed and threw her arms around me "oh I'm so glad!" she exclaimed she grabbed my hand and dragged me out the hut, "Come on, let's go show the guys!"

Her father's house was magnificent! So large and well built, the guys were sitting down to dinner when Suzu and I entered their jaws dropped.

"Wow Rin, you look like a real lady!" Norio beamed, a blush formed on my cheeks.

"Doesn't she!" Suzu giggled, clapping her hands, "Rin go have a seat, I'll bring in your food"

"And the girl with the _sake?_" Norio called after her, Shippo decked him on the head. The only empty place was by Kohaku, reluctantly that's where I sat.

"You really do look nice Rin" Kohaku complimented civilly, one piece of flattery from him pathetically made my day, I responded to this with a gentle and respectful smile as a thank you. Suzu returned with my food and the girl Norio requested.

The food she made was amazing! She cooks too! AH, there has to be something wrong with her! Something completely unlikable…so far there was nothing to go on. Eventually she and Kohaku left to see her father leaving the rest of us to enjoy our meals.

Shippo sniffed the air, "that smell…it" he looked over to me, then the smell hit me…it was the foulest thing and it was coming from me! "Rin it's the daisies! Take them out!"

I squealed as I tore them out of my hair, when they hit the ground they fizzled away "what the hell was that!" I seethed, Kirara growled at the petals.

Shippo came over inspected them "Their ordinary flowers, something or someone caused them to five off a foul odour…there is only one sort person who is capable of this…Rin who put these in your hair?"

"Suzu"

A look swept across Shippo's face, "I knew something was strange…" he mumbled, he snatched my hand and dragged me up "we have to find her!"

Norio was getting closer to the _sake _girl "Okay guys I'm just gonna stay here, keep Aki company" he called after us, Kirara mewed in confusion.

* * *

We found Suzu alone, Kohaku was still conversing with her father, "Hey you!" Shippo bellowed, Suzu's eyes widened "Not very smart are you…foxy".

_What the hell was he talking about_? Suzu clearly new "it was only a joke, I didn't mean any harm" she uttered sheepishly.

Shippo held out his hand with the fizzled petals placed in his palm, "Did you think I'd miss this? Did you think I wouldn't figure it out? Kohaku's a demon slayer…why hasn't he figured it out?"

Suzu held her hands behind her back and grounded her foot into the dirt "I haven't used that kind of magic around him before…this was the first time, I was always careful before".

Realization hit Shipp but neglected me "you wanted me to figure it out!" he concluded almost in disbelief "why?"

She shrugged and quietly muttered "I don't know…I've never seen another fox demon before"

Another fox demon? This was getting weird and I was growing increasingly annoyed "do you mind filling me in here?"

Suzu shied away, Shippo reached out and tucked her hair behind her _pointed_ ears…_wait pointy ears…she had pointy ears!__What the hell is she?_

"She's a fox demon, a female fox demon" Shippo made clear, I was shocked beyond all belief…how was this possible? Her father was definitely human, there is no way Kohaku wouldn't have noticed.

"B-but she doesn't have a tail! Shippo you have a tail…she doesn't!" I stuttered, completely bewildered.

Shippo and Suzu were locked in some kind of staring competition, barely even blinking "females don't have tails in their human form and their claws are a lot shorter, they're extremely convincing as humans, aside from the eyes and ears" he clarified.

I bolted close to Suzu, invading her personal space, "you have two minutes to explain everything…including why you made me smell like a cowpat!"

She sighed, "My father, is not really my father…he found me and raised me here…no one knew, not even Kohaku. My noticed I was getting lonely…no human man would accept me if they knew and he didn't want me leaving, so one of my own kind was out of the question…he thought Kohuku would be more understanding"

I chided "were you ever going to tell him?"

Suzu hunger head in shame, Shippo switched places with me and was now the one standing close to her, she peered up at him with a scarlet tint in her cheeks, he gently spoke "you don't really want to marry him do you?"

Suzu slowly shook her head "no…but it made my father happy and I didn't feel like I could say no…I've been pranking him for weeks, really acting up, hoping he'd reject me…but he's just too damn patient!" she looked over at me with sad eyes "I've known who you are for so long now…he utters your name in his sleep, he accidentally called me by your name…not even noticing that he has. He won't admit, but he doesn't want me Rin…it's always been you".

My heart raced…me, it's always been me? All this time he felt the same…this was happiness? I never felt so exhilarated and I had said so many horrible things to him…I had to apologise, I had to see Kohaku…he loves me! He loves me! I started running away.

"Wait you're not gonna tell him are you?" Suzu called out to me.

I halted "no" I answered "that's for you to do…I just really need to apologise" with that I continued on.

* * *

Shippo's POV

I didn't know what to say to her, she stared up at me expectantly…eventually I thought of something and smiled "that flower thing…pretty impressive" I flattered with sincerity.

"Thanks, wanna take a walk?"…

We found a nearby pasture full of flowers, "how did you hide it from Kohaku? Didn't he sense your demonic presence?" I asked.

She shrugged "I've been living with humans all my life, I've gotten really good at hiding it…I've wanted nothing more than to see another fox demon, even with all my friends here it's gotten so lonely…then you showed up and for the first time in my life…I just felt, complete".

Her eyes twinkled, we were both blushing fiercely, I knew exactly what she meant for I felt the same way. Everything seemed so…so, at ease with her, a certain harmony in her presence that I had never felt before with anyone else. I realised in that moment that Suzu was exactly what I'd been looking for my entire life. My insides swelled with such emotion when I remembered that she was already promised to someone else and that she would never break it off, she loved the man that raised her far too much, that she would allow herself to be miserable for the rest of her life. As a demon I knew the instincts and impulses she had, to explore, have adventures…to seek a new thrill at every corner. I knew I could provide this for her, we could travel together…but there was this huge stream of problems between us and no stepping stones for me to get across and reach her. She leaned her forehead on my shoulder "I'm so glad I met you Shippo, I've never been this content with anyone, it's like I've known you for years"

I leaned my head on hers, breathing in her scent and feeling the silk of her hair on my cheek "me too Suzu…I hate that when I leave…I may never see you again"…_ why did life have to be so unfair_?

* * *

Kohaku's POV

Suzu's father was a really nice man, he loved her a lot…he always insisted that he couldn't see he his daughter settled with anyone else, I'm exactly the kind of guy he hoped she'd marry. This was too much pressure, things were supposed to be easier with Suzu. In truth it made things harder, I had to pretend…but the only person that made everything seem okay…was Rin.

She made me forget my sins…she made me forget everything bad I've ever done and I couldn't allow that, I couldn't let myself feel happy…I had to punish myself for everything…I didn't deserve her. _What about what she deserves_? Norio's words played in my ears, that was just it…she deserved better.

"Kohaku!" came her voice, maybe I said her name too many times? Maybe I was thinking about her too much that some kind of magic made her appear. She leapt and me and held me close. I held her back tightly, she wasn't angry with anymore…despite how much I was hurting her, she had forgiven me.

"I'm sorry!" she wept_, god she smells so good_! "I don't hate you! I never have…I never have been able to…I know I've tried! I want you to be happy…If Suzu does that then-"

"-Rin"

"-Please, please let me finish….If she makes you happy then I promise I'll stay out of your life forever, Kohaku, I promise you"

"But I want you in my life Rin!" I exploded taking her fiercly by the arms and pulling her close, she gasped, "I _need_ you in my life…you're my best friend, you're all that gives me a moments peace. Rin if this were a perfect world it's you I'd be marrying…but I'm too damaged, I'm a walking pile of broken pieces that no one can ever put back together!"

"Because you refuse to let anyone try!" she retorted, clinging to my clothes "you won't let anyone fix you…I'm not all together either…If you want we could build each other up…together, maybe make something even better than before….I love you. I said it…I've wanted to for so long now, I know you do too…just be brave and say it…just say it…you don't have to act on it, just say it and then I can go on with my life knowing that I wasn't just making it all up in my head!"

_Say it_ I goaded, _say it_…the words wouldn't come out, and as much as I felt it…I couldn't. Loving her but keeping it quiet, that was the most unselfish act I've ever done, if I told just how much I love her knowing that I couldn't be with her…it would kill us both. She waited, but when realising that I couldn't answer, she nodded her head tearfully "I see…I'll go now" her voice small and fracturing, she turned away. Some impulse took over me…I reached out, grabbed her and kissed her! It was a long and passionate hold, I moved my hand up into her silk black tresses pushed her closer to me. How long I have dreamed of touching these soft lips again, craving another taste! I relased her so she could breathe…_be brave and say it_ "Rin…I love you" I pulled her into another kiss.


	7. Its time he let you go

**Chapter 7**

**It's t****ime he let you go**

Rin's POV

It was like some wonderful dream, Kohaku and I walking hand in hand like a couple. However there were so many questions I dared not ask…terrified I'd ruin what we had this very moment. It just seemed so natural, walking with him like this…this was how it was meant to be. But what did it mean? Was he still going to marry Suzu? Would I still be able to serve Lord Sesshomaru ? Like I said…I dare not ask.

"Kohaku where are we going?" I wondered, he gripped tighter to my hand.

"You haven't picked flowers for a while…I know a nearby pasture full of them" he replied "I used to wander through there, while my wounds were healing from a previous battle…I thought of you as I did…I laid amongst them and imagined that you were with me…talking none stop…your voice filling the empty silence, I always said to myself _Rin would love it here_, I'm really glad I have such an opportunity to show you".

My heart leapt like a horse over a fence, was he really saying all this? Would I suddenly wake up to discover that it was all a dream? I enfolded my arms around his and rested my head on his shoulder. This was amazing, if only if it was for tonight…even when morning came and all went back to the way it was this morning…tonight he's mine and I am his forever more.

We reached the pasture and I was shocked at what we had come across, there were dozens of Shippos and Suzus flitting about, some were chasing each other, others were flirting and some were just sitting close to each other whispering sweet nothings into each other's pointy ears. It would seem that Shippo had not only taught her the art of duplication…but fallen in love with her in the process! I watched for Kohaku's reaction but his deadpan face gave no insight to what he was thinking.

"She's fox demon" he stated, his voice also without expression.

"Uh…yeah, yeah she is" I said awkwardly scratching the back of my head.

He frowned at me "you knew about this?"

Was he jealous? Did he actually love Suzu that much? "No, no….well yeah, I knew that she was a fox demon but not that she and Shippo were getting so…close".

He turned a began walking away, "where are you going Kohaku? What are you going to do?" I called out to him. He didn't answer and soon he was gone.

Did he mean anything he said this night? I felt all the joy I had felt from his previous words get suddenly snatched away from me, angrily I charged at the crowed of Shippos and Suzuz. "Are you insane?" I yelled at them, their duplicates each disappeared in a puff of smoke till the real Shippo and Suzu were discovered, huddled together amongst a patch of flowers, looking extremely guilty.

"R-Rin…it's not what it looks like" Shippo stuttered waving his hands in front of him.

I raised my eyebrow and folded my arms "really? Then what exactly is this? I thought Kohaku was your friend!"

Shippo jumped to his feet tenderly taking Suzu up with him "Don't play innocent with me Rin… Kohaku's scent is all over you, there's no way you were just talking. Suzu and me…this is real, we are the same kind which means we are instinctively drawn to each other, it's like a magnetic pull, we can't help it and we can't stop it! Suzu has been denied everything a fox demon should have possesed, like a soul mate" he stopped allowing me to scoff at him; he looked even more infuriated "Rin I'm being serious! We demons take choosing a soul mate very seriously; most of us mate for life. Suzu and I…it's like two pieces of a puzzle…we just fit, like you and Kohaku. He may be my friend…and I don't want to fight him, but I will…if I have to…I will fight for Suzu".

Suzu clung to him peering up at him like he was radiating a celestial light, I kept my arms folded "well Kohaku was really angry by the looks of things, you may well have a fight on your hands Shippo….I don't want anything to do with this-this love triangle-square- THING! I'm officially out…I'm going back to the hut now, I'm going to sleep this headache off and let you three fight this out…whatever the outcome, Norio and I are, at least, leaving at first light!" with that I stormed off, leaving them alone. This was ridiculous, this whole journey was changing me…what would Lord Sesshomaru think if he knew I was in this situation, he'd be ashamed of me! I've just got to keep my head down and get on with the journey, forget Kohaku…forget everything he said, he clearly didn't mean any of it.

"Rin wait!" Shippo called, _why are demons so fast_? He zipped in front of me, zigzagging as I tried to get past, I grunted with irritation. "You're not taking me seriously!"

"Can you honestly blame me?" I exasperated, "you just met her and now she's your soul mate! Can you really blame me? Plus you're the first fox demon she has ever met! Of course she's going to be drawn to you, it's almost like you're taking advantage of that"

He sighed heavily at me "there's always that initial bond there…it reacts at the first meeting, it's like a spark…it sounds crazy I know…but it's true"

"Whatever Shippo, I told you I no longer want anything to do with this…it's all so pathetic!"

"No it's not Rin!" Suzu cried passionately, "fate brought Shippo and me together, just as it did you and Kohaku!"

I rolled my eyes "Kohaku and I clearly aren't together, he obviously has no intentions of leaving _you_, I no longer have a part to play in any of this…I don't think Kohaku even know what he really wants and I don't have the time to waste on him anymore, I'm done waiting around for him…for my own sanity I've got to just walk away from all of this!"

Shippo shook his head at me "you can't do that Rin and you know it…you'll always be waiting for Kohaku…you have done your entire life without even knowing it. Think of everything you went through together and alone…think of everything Naraku had put him and all of us through. That kind of history doesn't fade away, as much we try and run from it…we will always be haunted by what happened, Kohaku especially! Rin he wants you, he _needs_ you…the way I need Suzu…you can't walk away now…you'll be breaking your own heart if you do"

I growled, "Hey I've already died twice…a little heartache is nothing! So just leave me alone okay! I need sleep now!" this time when I left they did not try and stop me. I got back to the hut to see Norio asleep with Kirara curled up beside him. He was snoring loudly and drooling like a toddler "such an angel when he sleeps" I mused to myself as I prepared my own bedding.

"H-hey Rinny" he garbled from beneath the sheets, _fool obviously drunk too much sake again_ "think I could be a monk?"

I looked over him with a fond smile and tucked the sheets under him in the way you would a child "I think you can be anything you want to be slugger, just gotta put your mind to it".

"Aw th-thanks buddy…night Rinny Rin" that was all I could hear fall out of his mouth, he mumbled something else but it was too incoherent due to his mass intake of alcohol. It was soon followed by loud snores.

I giggled quietly and patted his head "good night, my big drunken toddler" internally I hoped his snoring would not keep me up all night. Tucking myself in, I was soon joined by Kirara, I nuzzled comfortably into her fur. _Kohaku…I almost had you tonight…almost._

* * *

Shippio POV

This was bad_, very_ bad…I hated the thought of fighting Kohaku…my friend; Suzu was not some random village girl…she was the person fate had chosen to be my partner in life and I would fight to keep her if he would not stand aside. I felt bad for Rin in this…she and Kohaku had obviously gotten closer tonight, he reeled her in just to throw her back in.

Suzu was walking beside me, her fingers laced in mine…her eyes downcast and forlorn, _even when sad she still looks so lovely._ "Shippo" she murmured almost sheepishly I acknowledged with a little hum "Am I…important? I mean…I overheard Norio talking about these other girls…from another village. You did mean everything you said to me didn't you? You will come back for me when you have delivered Rin to this Lord Sesshomaru?"

My heart swelled and I took her hands in mine, observing that her claws had gotten longer…she was looking less human; gazing into her eyes I answered "there is no one else Suzu…I _will _come back, you're all I have to come back to now my friends are living their lives…its time I lived mine and I'd like to live it with you….question is, will you willingly come with me when I return?"

She grinned impishly and threw her arms about my neck, but before she could answer another voice came "Will you Suzu?" we spun round to see Kohaku standing there with an unreadable expression.

I shifted Suzu behind me "Kohaku my friend, I don't want to fight you" I stepped forward and kneeled respectfully before him "….I'm asking that you please release Suzu from the betrothal and let me share my life with her".

Kohaku gave no clue as to what he was thinking, he looked down on me…he had a demon practically begging at his feet. Calmly he rested his eyes on Suzu, her pointed ears on full display…her eyes more vibrant…there was no mistaking what she was now. "Is that what you want Suzu? You want me to release you?"

She wiped under her eyes, "it's what you want too Kohaku" she answered stepping close to him "you know it is, I know that you are a man of your word and you'd keep your vowels…but you don't want me…you want _her…_in the same way that I want him" she gestured to me who was still kneeling. "Isn't it time that we both got something we wanted? Don't we deserve it Kohaku?"

He placed his hands on her shoulders "and the man that raised you?"

Suzu shrugged "It's time he let me go"

A sudden warm smile appeared on Kohaku's face "he thinks so too" he uttered. Suzu and I were clearly perplexed, he continued with an explanation "the moment I saw you together…I knew something was there, seeing you together again in the pasture…it was confirmed so I went and spoke to your father" he checked Suzu's reaction and mused in it a little "I explained the you and I…are in love with other people, that we destined to live our lives with them and not each other..Shippo get up, my friend, her father and I have a message for you"

Slowly I rose, to my feet…Kohaku came close and rested his hand on my shoulder in a brotherly fashion "you are to return to Suzu…you are to love and protect her for the rest of your life, you are to show her all that means to be a true and fox demon and help her discover who she is. Above all…you are to make her happy…can you do that Shippo? Can you do that my friend?"

I was speechless, what could I say? Suzu looked at me expectantly…Kohaku still had one hand on her arm. I smiled "I intend to Kohaku…I will tell her father myself, I will tell him that Suzu is to be my wife and I will never take her away from him…I wish to join his family and give him grandchildren…I will assure him that his daughter will forever be loved by me".

Kohaku's smile sustained as he took our hands and joined them together, Suzu gaed up at him, her eyes twinkling with tears of joy "thank you Kohaku".

With a simple nod and a look of pure content, he walked away…I didn't need to ask where he was going, I took Suzu into my arms…she was mine, mine completely.

I did have one thing to ask, "Hey Kohaku!" I called, he looked over his shoulder "Are we okay?"

He nodded "We're better than okay my friend…you know her better in one day, then I ever did the entire time we were betrothed…she was always meant for you…as Rin was for me" he then walked out of sight. I held Suzu closely…everything was finally working out.

"Hey Shippo!" came a drunken call, we broke from our tender moment to find Norio practically crawling towards us, _should not have left him alone with the sake__, _"Hey! That's Kohaku's girl! What are you doing!" he garbled incoherently, I winced with irritation.

Suzu saw this and chuckled "Actually I guess you could say I'm Shippo's girl now_" I really liked the way that sounded._

Norio jaw dropped and he stared wide-eyed for a moment before bursting into fits of laughter "wow! You really do like the unavailable ones don't you!"

I flinched feeling Suzu's fiery gaze upon me "what does he mean by that?" she demanded pulling at my ear.

"U-uh...N-nothing" I stuttered "something that happened a long time ago".

"You mean the other night" Norio scratched his head.

"Shut up you idiot!" I roared, Norio began to flee, I chased after him yelling all kinds of abuse.

Suzu wasn't far behind me she was shaking her fist in the air "Shippo! You better get back here and tell me the truth!"

_We're gonna wake up the entire village at this rate_…

* * *

Kohaku's POV

I had to find her! I had walked away so calmly but the moment I was out of sight I started high-tailing it towards the main hut. My guess was she had gone to bed…I had to beg her not to stay with Lord Sesshomaru and come live with me. We'd go back the Kaede's village…Sango would love that! I'd be near my sisters, my nieces and nephews…I'd start a family of my own. My plan was to stop demon slaying, be a blacksmith…it was a trade that often came with demon slaying anyway. Her village would need one too right?

It was perfect…I could finally let myself be happy! I have suffered and tortured myself enough…I _will _let myself be happy, I will again place my life in another's hands…Rin's hands. I turned a corner but bumped into something, me and the other person almost fell till I regained both our balance. It was a moment later I realised I was holding Rin in my arms, her face red and bashful.

"Kohaku"

"Rin"

We were silent for a while, I noticed I was still holding her and sheepishly let her go "I..uh was looking for Norio…I woke up and he was gone…I figured he shouldn't be out alone in his current state" she voiced not even looking me in the eye.

"I'm sure he's fine, I'll look for him in a moment…first there's something I wanna ask you" I took her hand and got down on one knee before, my eyes peering up at her…._asking a girl to marry you has to be the most nerve-wracking thing!_

"W-what is it? Kohaku?" she stammered nervously.

I opened my mouth to speak where there came a sudden cold chill…the hairs on the back of my neck stood up…this was an extremely powerful demonic aura.

"Kohaku what's wrong?" Rin asked noticing the sudden tension, I jumped to my feet and stood protectively in front of her.

"Rin…stay back, something strong is coming…I can feel it…when I tell you to run…do it, no arguments okay!" I ordered, looking into the distance, the village was suddenly surrounded by mist.

She clasped my arms "what about you" she whispered "can't I help?"

"You can help me by staying alive!" I retorted more firmly than I intended, I sensed to presence getting closer…with any luck my companions would have sensed it to.

"Hey Kohaku" came Norio's voice, he appeared along with Shippo and Suzu "The two fox demons say they sensed a demonic aura…then all this mist appeared"

I nodded "they're correct…something powerful surrounds us"….the antucupation grew as did the intensity of the aura, _this thing is too powerful_!

"Suzu" Shippo hissed to her, "take Rin and get inside"

She refused "I'm going to fight by your side…I'm stronger then I appear, I can certainly say you'll be surprised at what I'm capable of…I'll defend Rin at your side" she countered, readying for battle. _How did I not realise she was a demon before when now it was so obvious_!

"Rin…now, run" I commanded, she appeared at my side no longer shielded by me with a sword at the ready.

With a fierce and determined look in her eyes she re-joined "I will fight beside you all…whatever it is we'll take it down together..._all of us_"

Kirara flew down, her paws a light with fire…my comrades and I stood tall, a perfect team…me, Rin, Shippo, Suzu, Norio and Kirara…we stood united.

I saw a figure begin emerge from the "Now!" I yelled; Norio had chosen a bow and arrow for choice of weapon. He released the arrow with perfect aim…but it was deflected. Rin ran on despite my objections, she sliced at the dark figure but its movement was too quick and it dodged her attack, it appeared behind her and again she sliced at it only to discover for a second time that it was too quick "this thing is too fast" she called to me.

My heart almost stop when it again emerged behind her and took her into its arms, she screamed and struggled to be free "Rin!" I cried in horror "get your hands off her!" I was seething as I threw my large weapon at the figure…again it dodged it and my weapon was lost in the mist.

"Leave this to me!" Shippo growled "Fox fire" however his fire was gone with a gust of wind created from the approaching demon that still had Rin in its claw.

"Shippo no!" Suzu screamed "You'll hit Rin…we must first get rid of this mist….everybody hold onto something" with that I dug my sword into the ground, Shippo dug in his claws (as did Kirara) and Norio used an arrow. Suzu closed her eyes and raised her arms…with a swift graceful gesture she called "_Wind push_!" as though actually pushing their air away the mist blew back with incredibly force, it was so strong that I could not hold on! I was swept up into the air…when I thought all was lost Kirara emerged, grabbed me and brought me back to safety. When the mist cleared I sat on Kirara's back ready to attack with the weapon I had reclaimed on the way back to stable ground. However a sight came to view that made me drop it…it fell to the ground with a loud clang. Shippo gasped, we both recognised this being. Norio made another movment to attack till I hindered him.

"It can't be" Shippo breathed taking hold of Suzu.

"Who is this guy? Why won't you let me attack? He's go Rin dammit!" he snarled and sneered not taking his eyes of Rin's "captive"

I slid from Kirara's back and calmly approached him, he was holding Rin with great care…she had passed out it would seem. I kneeled before him with great respect "my Lord Sesshomaru…why have you come?" I asked with a subservient tone, the masterful demon Lord of the western lands narrowed his cold hard eyes at me, the golden gaze wavering deep in my soul…sending an awful shiver up my spine…_why do I feel like I'm in__trouble_?


	8. fight for her

**Chapter 8**

**Fight for her**

Kohaku's POV

The fierce dog demon glared at me…his face beheld no emotion…he was as still as stone and twice as cold. He held Rin attentively in his arms, sneering at the demon slaying outfit my sister had made her (not sure when she changed back into the outfit). I remained kneeling, my head bowed "Lord Sesshomaru…why have you come here?"

He narrowed his eyes at me "I grew impatient…I have come for my ward".

I wanted to snatch her away from him, he knew my intentions…why else would he appear so suddenly, the rest of us stared at him, only me, Kirara and Shippo with recognition. However..Suzu and Norio could easily see that this was a demon not to be messed with and I told them about him previously.

I rose from the ground "was it not my duty to bring her to you?" I asked rhetorically.

He said nothing… he turned and began walking away carrying Rin with him…I flinched…what could I do? This was the entire purpose of our mission and yet I couldn't just let him walk away with her…this wasn't the right time, there was so much left unsaid between she and I. _Move_ I ordered myself, _don't just let him take her_! The other members of our group were looking at me with the same demand. I ran after them, my arm outstretched.

"My lord, please wait!" I pleaded, he halted but kept his back to me "Please wait till she awakens….let us have our chance to say goodbye to her, we may never see her again".

Sesshomaru waited for a moment then continued to carry her away, away from the village and out of my life, his last words echoed and I knew the moment he said them that he had been watching us the entire journey "find another bride…perhaps if you ask her nicely enough, the she-fox will reconsider you" and with that he took off in a flash of white light.

Kirara came abreast; I laid my hand on her head as I looked up at the sky hoping to catch another glimpse of Rin.

Norio gawped with pure disbelief "what the hell guys!" he exclaimed in his outrage and gripping at his bow and arrow, "did we really just let that happen? Did we really just do nothing and let that demon take her away!"

"That was the entire point of this journey…that was the one we were delivering her to, that was who Rin was trying to return to…she wanted to go with him" Shippo answered in my stead.

Norio made a noise of disproval "she wasn't even conscious!" he exclaimed throwing his arms dramatically in the air "how do you know what she wanted? Maybe she'd changed her mind…now she's gonna wake up and see that we just let her be taken! We have to go after her!"

"No!" I snapped, they all looked at me surprised that I had finally spoken "this is what Rin wanted, this is what she wished for when she was a little girl, to be with her Lord Sesshomaru forever"

"She was a kid when she made that wish!" Suzu argued "that's what she want once…now she wants you! I know she does…call it woman's intuition if you want but she practically told you that herself anyway!"

Why was I getting a lecture? "What do you know Suzu...you've known her for less than a day!"

She frowned at me "I only had to know her minute before realising just how deeply she cares for you, it only took an instant to figure out…everyone who looks at you two can see that you have something worth fighting for! Fight for her Kohaku….we have to go after her!"

"No!" I growled, don't they know how much this is killing me! Don't they realise that I want nothing more than reclaim her…but I can't reclaim what was never officially mine….

Norio grabbed me by the shoulders "you followed this girl to the underworld! You carried her body as it grew colder…you've protected her with your life, are really telling me that you're willing to let her go now!" He spoke so firmly, for a guy with dark past he was always so light-hearted now he had a certain seriousness that I didn't like, when I didn't respond he continued "if you won't go then I will…you In Suzu?"

The she-fox nodded "definitely"

Norio faced Shippo who was being unusually quiet "what about you?" he asked "are you in?"

Shippo shrugged "I think…we should stay out of this…this is between Rin, Kohaku and Lord Sesshomaru" he answered, Suzu and Norio raised their eyebrows.

"Shippo be honest" said his betrothed "you want to go after Rin just as much as we do…stop pretending otherwise".

Shippo had his eyes closed sensing her staring at him he opened one, a cold sweat forming on his brow "Fine!" he burst out "Fine…I really want to go after her! I want you two to stop being so complicated and just get together! I want to see you ride off into the sunset and have kids that refer to me as uncle Shippo!"

Suzu smiled and laced her arms around his "better?"

Shippo nodded "Much better".

I rolled my eyes and gave a sigh of exasperation, looking at each of their faces…all so determined, even Suzu and Norio, they hadn't known her as long as Shippo and me… yet already they were willing to fight for her…Rin seemed to have that effect on everyone she met, had done ever since she was a child. They felt this way because they were right…Rin _was_ worth fighting for! I could picture it all…her and me…a family, no other face! Everything my sister and Miroku had said to me before we left…they were right…I have had that moment….everything was clear…I love Rin and I won't give her up! I looked down at Kirara and smirked "you ready girl?" I asked patting her head, she snarled with agreement, the flames at her feet flaring.

"Come on! If we leave now we'll make it to the western lands just after sunrise!" I said, jumping onto Kirara's back, I was followed by cheers.

"What about breakfast?" Norio whined, I rolled my eyes.

"Shut up bandit boy and hop on" Shippo rebuked as he transformed into a hawk.

"No need" Suzu chirped in, "I'll take him" with that she transformed into a beautiful hawk, her green eyes gleaming and she carried Norio away in her claws.

"See Shippo" Norio called down to Shippo as he stared after her in amazement "this is what a hawk is supposed to look like!"

Shippo scoffed and took off into the air, joining Suzu in flight "give it a rest!" he squawked.

I stared after them for a moment, these were my travelling companions, my friends…I wouldn't change them for the world. Kirara took off into the sky, _I'm coming Rin_.

* * *

Rin's POV

There came the sweet smell of flowers and the gentle sound of birds, I squirmed…I was in a bed, one befitting royalty…the sheets so soft and warm. I opened my eyes to a white light…everything was white and clean. Between the white pillars there laid a beautiful view…we were tucked high into the mountains with, the green landscapes…the clouds…it was paradise. Water trickled lightly from the flowers that were placed in what I assumed was _my_ room. During my wandering I came across a grand mirror. _Who dressed me_? I was wearing a long elegant silk kimono (also white), someone had tied my hair into a loose plait. Upon a glistening table their rested a delicious breakfast…_what happened to me last night? Wait was I kidnapped? What happened to the others? Are they all okay_? Such questions circled my mind, all I could conclude was that whatever attacked us last night had now taken me hostage. What a fool this creature must be…If my Lord Sesshomaru did not come for me, then Kohaku certainly would…even if he was still betrothed to another…_wasn't he_? _What was he going to ask me before we were attacked_?

"Rin!" shrilled a voice….one that I had not heard in years, joyfully I raced to the source.

"Master Jaken!" I hailed sweeping his tiny form into my arms and squeezing him like a teddy bear! I had almost forgotten how tiny he was, there was an old happiness that I had not felt since I was a child. "Oh master Jaken I'm so glad to see you? Did the demon kidnap you too? Is Lord Sesshomaru coming for both of us?"

Jaken struggled from my grasp "get off me you stupid girl!" he shrieked at me, _oh Jaken you haven't changed a bit!_ "we weren't kidnapped, you are in the home of Lord Sesshomaru…you rest in his castle in the western lands".

I blinked "Lord Sesshomaru? He's the one that kidnapped me?"

Jaken's eyes turned wide and he appeared taken aback "What are you talking about!" he screamed at me "he didn't kidnap you…he _collected _you! You were taking far too long so he went and got you himself. As a matter of fact he waits for you in the gardens now…he has sent attendants to help you dress, they will see you are fully prepared for your audience with the great Lord Sesshomaru" he moved towards the threshold.

"Please don't go yet master Jaken…we've so much to catch up on" I called after him only to be ignored. I was suddenly bombarded by five female attendants, all dog demons too. They crowded me, shaking various fabrics in my face and pulling at my hair, deciding how they would style it.

Eventually they settled on a red silk Kimono, edged with gold, they laced a bodice about my waits, the sleeved so long that you could not see my hands. They styled my hair in the way Suzu had done previously…but these flowers were red and had little chance of fizzling out into a hideous odour. They powdered my face, lined my eyes with black and painted my lips rouge. All this time there was always something about my looks that clung to my former youth…I always thought I appeared quite childish, now in the mirror stood a full grown woman…instead of the former girl I was.

"You look lovely Lady Rin" one cooed admiring her work, I smiled with appreciation.

"For a human" I heard another mutter, I decided to ignore it…I had much more important things to think of. When I was deemed ready to approach Lord Sesshomaru I was escorted to the gardens. It was like heaven on earth… I had never seen so many beautiful flowers…I thought of how lovely they would look on Lady Kaede's grave and how much she'd appreciate them.

To my utter delight I saw an old friend, Ah-Un grazed beneath the sakura tree…I skipped towards the two headed beast with open arms and gently hugged one the heads that nuzzled into me. "Oh Ah-Un" I crooned gently gliding my fingertips across his rough scales "I've missed you so much old friend".

"Rin" I heard a voice speak from behind me, a shiver round down my spine and my heart pounded. There amidst the beautiful garden stood Sesshomaru, so majestic and enchanting ….he was still the dashing figure I remember…the hero of light that came into my life when it was at its darkest. He was my guardian…,my eyes welled up with happy tears, I had honestly missed him so much.

"Lord Sesshomaru" I breathed, my hand hovering over mouth.

"I trust you slept well" he continued…it was strange, he spoke as he always did…without emotion but calm and with such authority, but before I could still practically hear his thoughts…now I could not and it was strange.

I nodded, "I suppose so…I don't recall much"

"You don't recall attacking me with a sword?" he mused with a ghost of a smile…it was too small to tell.

My eyes widened like a doe's "I'm so sorry my Lord! If I knew it was you I'd never done such a thing!" I babbled.

With unbelievable yet effortless speed he came before me…standing close "I'm aware of that fact" he stated bluntly.

After a moments silence I mustered enough courage to ask "what did Kohaku say when you _collected_ me? Did he have a message? Was he sad to see me leave?"

If there was a smile upon his face it soon vanished at the mention of Kohaku's name, "there was no message…he said nothing, he seemed content" he answered.

_My head hung, __he said nothing? He seemed…content? Did Kohaku mean it when he told me he loved me_? "I see" I uttered quietly…why did I feel like crying so much? A something broke in my chest like a huge crack in a pond of ice.

"You seem somewhat melancholy" he observed "Is this not what you wanted? To serve your Lord…is that not what you wished for?"

I nodded my head "yes that is what I wished for…a long time ago" I stepped closer to him and stared up into his face…he was just as tall as I remembered. "My Lord…you were once all I had and all I needed, my protector, my friend and all…but I'm not the same little girl anymore...I'm fully grown and I'm human…vexed with all mortal flaws. There are things I need…there are _people _I need…I ask that you let me go to my friends…if I'm to stay with you…I need to say goodbye to them…then once again I will let you be the centre of my world and serve you for the rest of my life, till my hair turns grey".

His eyes were so intense, what was Sesshomaru to me now that I was fully grown? There was a bond there…emotions too deep for friendship…yet I could conjure no romantic images of him. Was he a father figure? No….I had a father…he was killed and no one could ever take his place not even a powerful demon lord like Sesshomaru. He was my guardian…and that was how I loved him. But now there was Kohaku…my friend, my love, my protector…I couldn't say that he took Sesshomaru's place…no one could, just like no one could take my father's; Kohaku had his own place in my heart…an entire section dedicated to him…that piece had broken off and I left it with him. I wondered if he knew that he possessed that piece and wondered what he would do with it if he did know.

Sesshomaru had a way of reading my thoughts "Rin…I forbid you to leave the grounds of my domain, you may send a letter" with that he turned and walked away from me…all I could do was watch.

Was this not what I wanted? I was sure it was…never had I felt so torn, part of me was so thrilled to be with Lord Sesshomaru…he made gave me a certain peace and I indeed felt safe with him, but the other half yearned for Kohaku. With Lord Sesshomaru I could never again live as normal human, by now I had become so accustomed to such a life…that I had begun to severely miss it. As I rested in the gardens I imagined what life would be like with Kohaku…a family, a simple home. On the other hand there was another future…one in this beautiful castle…servants attending me, Jaken, Ah-Un and Sesshomaru. Had I changed too much by now to go back to how I was? I wanted to travel with my friends… I missed travelling; I needed to be closer to nature. What did Kohaku want to ask me? Why did he so willingly let me go before he could ask? Maybe I just wasn't worth holding onto. Ah-Un now rested under the tree, the ink petals falling gracefully, he allowed me to curl up beside him (as I had done when I was a child) and lose myself to self-pity.

_Kohaku…Shippo, Norio, Kirara, Suzu_…will I ever see you guys again? _Kohaku_…

* * *

Sesshomaru's POV

From a distance I observed my young ward…sadness tainted her face. I recall the first time I saw her smile…it was the first time a human had ever caused any emotion other than anger. I remember the rage I felt when I saw the bruises on her face and the strange desire to protect her. The desire never went away even now. In all truth…Rin was my one weakness, all my enemies new this…nothing was worth the cost of her life. I Sesshomaru had someone to protect. Then the demon Slayer boy appeared with the same need to guard my ward…little by little he was pushing me aside, something my pride would not allow! There was a time when I was all she needed, she idolised me…why was this boy having such an effect on her. It was because Rin had needs that I could not fulfil…needs only Kohaku could soothe.

When she was a child I could give her everything…now it would seem I nothing more to give. Deep down I knew Kohaku and the others were coming for her, I would leave the decision to Rin. That girl is the one human in the world that can safely say…Sesshomaru would never harm me. Rin is the only human I'd risk my life for…when her inevitable death comes, it will remain that way for she is irreplaceable.

I looked out to the sky, the morning sun shining "Kohaku…you have found your way into her heart…but never forget…I was there first".

* * *

Kohaku's POV

"I see it just up ahead" called Suzu.

"That where she lives now?" Norio tolled in as he dangled from her claws, "I'm not gonna lie…I can see the appeal".

_At least he says it like it is_; it was like some magnetic pull bringing me closer and closer…however the lower we got the more danger I sensed.

From far beneath their shot a stream of fire, Kirara and I managed to dodge it as did Shippo…Suzu however was hit, she morphed back into her former appearance and began to fall, Norio too as she had no choice but to release him. I heard Shippo cry out his name and catch her on his back, I grabbed Norio's wrist and dragged him onto Kirara,

"Shippo!" I hollered, my tone filled with sincere concern "Is Suzu okay?"

"I'm fine!" she answered for herself as she propped herself up on Shippo's back, his hawk wings spread wide.

"But I'm about ready to break some heads!" Shippo snarled.

Another fire stream was aimed at us…someone didn't want us here clearly…._I recognise this demoni presence and fire power…could it be the staff of two heads? Was this Jaken's doing_! The fire that was shot was deflected by Suzu's wind push.

"What is up with this wind thing?" Norio wondered aloud.

Shippo answered "Fox demons usually hold sway over a particular element…I can produce fire but Suzu can manipulate the wind".

Last thing we needed was a fox demon lesson! "Guy focus" I commanded firmly, "Shippo, take Norio and Suzu down below try and hold off the defences for a little while" I instructed further before swooping in the opposite direction to them "I'm going to find Sesshomaru!"

Here we were, we had reached the destination…the love of my life lay somewhere inside, but before I could take her back…I would need to confront Sesshomaru, I just hoped the others could hold off the guards long enough….


	9. the decision is yours

**Chapter 9**

**The decision is yours **

Suzu's POV

Did they have any idea why we were here or do they really just attack who ever approached the castle. Norio, Shippo and I made it to the battlements…my forearms still stinging from a previous burn I had received. Guards came at either end, Shippo and I fought with our fists and fox magic "Wind push" I summoned and with mighty gust of wind they were thrown from the stone walls. Norio was putting up a good fight, using his daggers…_he has so many weapons_!

"Here pretty" called a big butch dog demon, he carried with him a battle-axe almost as large as him "wanna taste my blade?" _why do I get the feeling he's not talking about his axe! I'll cut out his wretched tongue w__ith my claws_! I lunged, swiping at him with my sharp claws; I left a deep scratch mark across his face. I lunged again and he grabbed my wrist "foxy likes it rough does she?" he leered over me the tip of his tongue meeting my cheek, I squealed with disgust "let me show you how rough I can be!" he added flinging me like a ragdoll. With a might crash I hit the stone wall, momentarily unable to breathe. As I struggled to move the battle-axe came flying at me "Shippo!" I screamed squeezing my eyes shut and cowering.

"Suzu!" I heard my beloved cry, arms flung about me…then a noise…like a knife stabbed through wet lettuce. Shippo was hit by the battle axe! I shrilled with utter terror! My heart pounded at a dangerous rate…my vision covered by a red haze. With tears streaming down my face, I cupped his in my hands…beholding the face I loved with my whole heart as it winced with excruciating pain. I gazed into his dying eyes "Shippo no!" I screamed "why did you do that? Please…please hold on" I leaned my forehead against is…I was ready to kill! From over my dying loves shoulder I spotted his attacker who bore an evil grin of satisfaction. I laid Shippo down and stood in front of him protectively.

"It's okay pretty fox" the dog demon guard taunted "you'll join him soon"

I clenched my fists so tightly I thought they were about to bleed…I'd never been so angry in my life! With some power unknown to me…I slashed him to pieces with my claws, he fell down dead and in parts. I braced myself and turned to save Shippo only to see had vanished, not a speck of blood in sight…only the battle-axe laid there, also clean of blood. "Shippo?" I sreamed running through the crowds of me, taking them down as I did so "Shippo!" I gripped at the axe, a hand laid on my shoulder, _whoever you a__re…prepare to die! _With full force I swung round swiping with the axe only to be hindered. He grabbed my wrist…such a beautiful sight that I dropped the weapon and forgot the chaos surrounding us. I wrapped my arms around his neck and wept…even if hit was just an illusion, I didn't want to wake up "Shippo!" I sobbed.

"Look out!" he bellowed, grabbing me and leaping us to safety before another fire-ball hit us. When were tucked away I took to opportunity to grab his face and kiss him! "for an illusion…you feel so real…why did you have to die".

Shippo chuckled and held me close "I didn't…that was a doppelganger…I duplicated" he corrected.

"You did!"

"Yeah…my duplicates are everywhere"

I turned my head around the corner to see it was true…dozens of Shippos were fight alongside Norio_, had I been so preoccupied in battle that I hadn't noticed_? Again Shippo laughed at me, adding to my rage, my palm met his with a cold harsh slap. He stared at me befuddled, holding his hand over his sore cheek. "Don't you _ever _scare me like that again!" I snarled through gritted teeth "I thought I'd lost you!" I again brought him into my embrace, he held me back…his heart drumming against mine.

"I'm sorry" he whispered in my ear "I didn't mean to upset you!"

This guy was really willing to die for me, he took the bite of an axe…even if it was just his doppelganger. I loved him….more than my own life!

"Guys!" we heard Norio call, we sprinted to his aid only to find that he stood on a pile of defeated foes…all the duplicated Shippos had gone. How did an ordinary human man do all this? He read the question on my face and smirked flipping his dagger up and catching it effortlessly in his hand "don't mess with bandit boy eh?"

I smiled and shook my head_, crazy fool_, Shippo took my hand "Suzu do you smell that?" he asked sniffing the air.

I mimicked and the gasped "that's Rin's scent...she's nearby".

Norio frowned "let's get our girl back…then we'll find Kohaku" though we instantly agreed, till there came another spout of fire, we turned to see a little frog demon with a two headed staff with another hoard of dog demon guards behind him.

"Jaken" Shippo rumbled with scornful expression "stop this…we just wanna see Rin"

The frog demon Jaken, as Shippo referred to him, gripped at his staff "you intend to take her? You cannot! My lord and I have waited too long for her return and we will not surrender her!" with that annoying shrilly voice, he threw more flames at us, Shippo drew me back and dragged Norio away by his collar.

"Suzu" Shippo murmured to me pushing me behind him, "go find Rin while Kohaku finds Sesshomaru and Norio and I deal with these idiots".

I shook my head, "I won't leave you!"

"Go! It may be our only chance!" he ordered, I obeyed…while he and Norio fought off the guards, I followed Rin scent.

* * *

_A garden…is she here_? I wondered as I wandered through amidst the natural beauty. Suddenly I stumbled upon Rin laying under a sakura tree with a two headed dragon-horse-thing. _She seems so peaceful, is she completely unaware of the battl__e that rages on just outside?_

"Ah-Un…I'm so torn" I heard Rin utter, she seemed deep in conversation with the two headed dragon…it would be so awkward to just barge in so I hid behind a tree, I couldn't help but listen as she continued; "All my life I have needed them both…I still do, I cannot live my life without either of them! Truth is I love them both…in very different ways. This is killing me! Its gut-wrenching I just wanna cry! I wanna be a child again, it was so much easier back then…all I needed and wanted was to be with my lord" she paused and wiped her tears away and snuggling closer to the beast "I'm glad to be next to you old friend….you give me comfort…thank you. This pain is almost too much…I just wanna crawl into some dark hole and never come out…I want to sleep my life away".

Poor Rin, I stepped out from my hiding place and approached her…

* * *

Rin's POV

"Rin" spoke a voice cautiously, with a gasp I saw Suzu standing there her hand slightly outstretched, Ah-Un groaned and grunted with discomfort at the new presence, I told him to hush…I told him she was just a friend of mine.

"Suzu…is that you? Are you really here?" I asked slowly impending to her, I had this strange urge to hug her, it was weirdly wonderful to see her…even if she was engaged to Kohaku.

She nodded her head "Of course it is! Rin it's good to see you, you were taken and even though it was what was meant to happen…it didn't feel right for us to let you go. We've come back for you"

I shifted nervously "E-even Kohaku" I mumbled.

A bright smile hit Suzu's face "Of course! He wants to live his life with _you_ Rin!"

My heart skipped a beat "W-what about you? Aren't you-"

"-My life is to be spent with Shippo" she interrupted with such pride, I was almost overwhelmed with happiness to hear that.

"Really?" I gushed.

Suzu took me by the hands as though we were sisters,"Rin" she began "…Kohaku has come for you…the way Sesshomaru did….but ultimately the decision lies with you…will you stay here…or will you come with us?"

I couldn't answer…I couldn't bring myself to say that I would willingly leave Sesshomaru…but staying would mean leaving Kohaku…another thing I could not fathom! "I can't" I breathed emotionally "I can't live without either of them!" I began to release more tears, Suzu enveloped me in a warm gentle hug like a mother Hen to her baby Chick. I clasped to her… "I can't do it! I can't….I'd rather die than live without _one_ of them!"

"Ssssh now" Suzu soothed, "this decision was never meant to be easy for you Rin".

"It once was" I blubbered, "when I first arrived at the human village I hated it…I was counting down the days till I could be with Lord Sesshomaru again…then I fell in love. How can I choose? Both have loved and protected me with their lives and both hold one half of my heart,…imagine you were me….take everything I have told you into consideration, my history with both…everything…who would you choose?"

I had rendered Suzu speechless…she did not know either, I wiped my tears away and swallowed down the lump in my throat.

Suzu grabbed my hand "Where is Sesshomaru…Kohaku has gone to find him…where is the place he'd most likely be?"

I thought carefully for a moment, there was only one place…"the throne room"…

* * *

Kohaku's POV

Lord Sesshomaru…I owe you so much, we both know that…but Rin is the one thing (aside from my sister and her family) that I'd fight you for! I could sense his strong demonic presence…. Kirara and I crashed through the ceiling; he was sitting pompously on his throne, his fingertips tapping on his ivory throne. Sesshomaru did not look at all surprised to see me, _it's like he's been waiting_.

"Lord Sesshomaru" my voice echoed throughout the hollow room "you've clearly been expecting me".

"Hn" was all he uttered as he stood from his sitting position and glided down the ivory pearl steps, he clicked his claws "you've come looking for a fight" he spoke.

I kneeled down before him as I did that previous night in the village "My Lord…it is not my wish to fight you…I wish to make Rin my wife, I ask only for your blessing not your permission…with or without your acceptance…I will make her mine, is she will have me".

His golden eyes narrowed at me, a certain glare that many years ago would have chilled me to the bone! But the icy effect of his cold stare melted in the flames of my determination, he could visibly see this himself.

"She will not go" he answered simply, "she will choose to remain….but by all means ask her if you so choose" with that he raised his arm and flexed his fingers causing the ginormous doors to his throne room to blast open, there at the threshold with a stunned expression stood Rin and Suzu having clearly only just arrived, _of course he could sense them coming_.

"K-Kohaku" Rin breathed…I could see it in her eyes that she was glad to see me, she stood at the threshold clad in red, a true scarlet beauty. Everyone else present was no longer conceivable to me, it was like they had vanished and it was she and I alone…._Rin._

Wordlessly we met in the middle…our arms opened wide, ready to receive each other's warm embrace. She felt so good in my arms, she fitted perfectly there…it was as though my arms were made to hold her and now I couldn't imagine anyone else take her place, _it's just as Miroku said_…

She peered up, her hand lying on my chest, feeling my heartbeat sore "Kohaku" she murmured softly, her small red lips trembled with sadness and I longed to place my lips on them "seeing you now…it makes everything so much more unclear".

I frowned and leaned my forehead against hers, I opened my mouth to speak only when the words were about to fall, I was hindered by Sesshomaru "Kohaku" he spoke in a frighteningly serene tone "Ask her".

Rin's brows knitted together, her eyes flickered to me, then to Sesshomaru and then back at me, I took her hands in mine "Rin…" I began, inhaling and exhaling with nervousness, Suzu watched with true interest, Norio and Shippo soon joined her at her side and they also stared with eager eyes "Rin…I want you to come away with mes…I want us to settle down. Rin, become my wife, become the mother of my children…grow old with me, die with me someday". When she did not speak and panicked "Or…if you prefer, we'll travel first, we'll see the world together…you, me…even them if you want" I said gesturing to our travel companions, they all smiled warmly in response, feeling their support I continued, "I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy…because seeing you smile and being the cause of it…it's the best feeling in the world, I never felt anything so good, so pure, nothing so.. _Wonderful_… as what I feel when I'm with you. If I reach the end of my life, having lived it with you…I'll die with a smile on my face…what do you say Rin….Will you come away with me?"

A single tear escaped those amber eyes, her hand cupped my cheek so tenderly…_kami _I loved this woman! "Sesshomaru…would you hate me if I left?" she asked timidly, not taking her eyes off me for a moment.

"…You may do as you please" was his eventual and blunt response.

She fully turned to him, more tears streaming down her face "Will I ever see you again?" she asked him.

"No" he answered, her face winced…almost with pain.

Her breath hitched "Can Kohaku stay with us?" she was pleading now…seeking desperately for some sort of compromise.

"No" he repeated, I was getting furious.

I stepped in "can I at least visit!" I exasperated.

"Never" he growled at me, his eyes glowering at me.

This was it…it was him or me, her breathing grew heavier she clasped her hair in her hands…voices in her head clearly screaming at her…_please Rin….Please choose me_!

* * *

Rin's POV

The voices in my screaming different answer _stay…go…stay…no go, stay,go,stay,go, stay,go! AH_! Life without Sesshomaru…uninmaginable….life without Kohaku…unbearable. I saw it all…my best moments with them, those moments that had made my life worth living! When I woke up from a dark haze with Sesshomaru looking down at me, he brought me back from the dead twice…he saved me from harm. Then there came Kohaku…the night I was kidnaped and I woke to him…we shared a watermelon and delved deep into our past! The day we kissed! As a young girl, I loved Sesshomaru..that girl still existed somewhere inside of me, but as a woman…I loved Kohaku.

A searing pain ran straight through my centre like someone was literally cutting me in half! A huge sting in my heart…like I was being stabbed, I looked down to the source of the pain…on my chest upon the space where my heart laid beneath…it glowed. The others in the room stared at me with pure panic, "Rin! Rin what's happening! RIN!" Kohaku cried grabbing me as my legs began to give way. Sesshomaru zoomed to my side.

"Hand her over!" he demanded, Kohaku held me tighter to him, possessively. Sesshomaru growled "give her to me now!"

"Back off Sesshy you vicious dog!" Norio threatened, what a fool! My Lord seemed to preoccupied with me to retaliate, otherwise Norio would be dead.

"Quiet bandit boy…he will kill you!" Shippo reprimanded pulling him aside; tears were in his eyes…_are they all so worried? Do I mean that much to them?_

I could no longer feel my legs, I completely collapsed, Kohaku caught me…the glowing spot on my chest grew brighter…pain filled me from head to toe…I let out one last cry of agony!

* * *

Kohaku's POV

As she screamed a light shot from her chest…a bright purple light! It was even more terrifying when her screaming stopped and laid limp in my arms, a…jewel hovered between us, a large hole in her chest.

"Rin?" I breathed, shaking her…the hole in her chest repaired itself…but still she did not wake. Sesshomaru gripped at my shoulder.

"Put her down and back away " he ordered, he didn't give me much choice, he forced me away. The sound of weapons hitting the floor echoed. Tears streamed, aside from Sesshomaru who refused to show any emotion, despite the deep soreness I know he felt. The only time I saw anything like this…was with Midoriko and the sacred jewel.

"What is that?" Suzu breathed.

"The sacred jewel? I thought we destroyed that?" Shippo put in.

Norio grunted, his emotion was running down his cheek "what is a sacred jewel? Who the hell is Midoriko? What has it to do with Rin!"

"Midoriko was a demon slayer" I began to explain, my voice shaky…my eyes steadily upon the jewel "…she confined herself and a demon inside her own soul, for years a battle raged on inside it, till the jewel was broken into tiny pieces…it's a long story, but eventually it was completely restored and then destroyed. It was a battle between good and evil that drew the jewel from her…but with Rin…"

"-It was the battle of affection" Suzu finished, eyes looked to her for explanation, "Rin told me how desperately she wanted to be with both of you….the torment, the overwhelming love she felt…her desire to be with you both…it literally tore her soul out…creating this!" she gestured to the jewel. Suzu grew more emotional and stood beside me, her hand on my shoulder. "She told me just wanted to fall asleep and never wake up…she wanted to torture to go away" she faced Sesshomaru angrily "you could have stopped this!" she shouted tearfully at "If you were just willing to let her go!"

"Suzu" Shippo hissed, pulling her into him…she sobbed onto his chest.

"That's Rin soul?" Norio asked pointing at it; I nodded "Well put it back! Put it back in and save her! Come on…from what I hear this girls always dying and coming back to life!"

"She's not dead" Sesshomaru stated intensely "her heart still beats".

"He's right" Shippo concurred "I hear it too".

I let out a gasp of relief…she still lived, but for how much longer…if her soul remains external. _So this soul...inside it is Rin's soul…her feelings, her memories…everything?_

I reached out to it, but at the touch of my fingertip…it began to crack…till finally it shattered into tiny pieces and scattered, they darted through the walls and windows…far out of our sight. At first we were speechless…what's happened, we looked to Rin as she laid there.

"She's not dead" Sesshomaru repeated "She is in a comatose…when her soul is returned…she will awaken".

Jaken suddenly raced in, when he saw Rin he dropped his staff, "R-Rin…RIN! My Lord wh-"

"-Jaken" Sesshomaru interrupted as he scooped Rin into his arms, I made a move towards him but was stopped by Shippo and Suzu, Norio would have let me attack. "Get shaman" he ordered and carried her away…we followed him, he did not argue. He laid her in a shrine, upon a beautiful flower covered stone pyre, he laid a pillow under her head. Dressed in red she stood out from the white petals that surrounded her…like something from a work of art.

We stood around her…waiting for the Shaman…

* * *

The shaman soon came…a small old looking man with a shrill voice…his ear large but pointed and with him he carried a staff. When he entered he saw us all standing around her all dark and mournful. He examined her before us, laying his hand on her heart.

"Her soul is indeed gone…she lives like a hollow shell" he began, "the shards of the jewel must be restored…then she will wake as her former self…who will undertake this journey".

_Stupid question…we all would_! "Kohaku" Sesshomaru started, looking down on Rin "the one who collects the most shards…keeps her".

I glared at him "Very well….right now I will survive whatever the outcome…so long as it was one where she lives!" I retorted and all though he wouldn't admit it, he agreed with me. Without another word he fled into the air, with Jaken attached to his long fur.

"Come on we're wasting time!" I yelled, but before we could leave the Shaman stopped us.

"Do you know what you're getting into?" he asked us warningly, we all looked at him. "this is the journey of the soul…along the way you'll not only discover many things about this girl, but also things about yourselves…you'll discover secrets and feelings you never knew you kept! It may be dark…it will be dangerous, will you risk it?"

"I will!" I answered without hesitation, I faced the others.

"As will I" said Shippo

"And me" said Suzu

"Count me in slayer!" Norio finished. Kirara mewed.

"You hear that!" I said with full pride in my team, looking down at Rin scraping my fingers gently through her hair "We won't fail you…we're gonna do everything you'd want us to do along the way! We're gonna avenge Norio's brother and parents…we'll find out about Suzu's past and we'll carry you with in our hearts every step of the way…you'll be our inspiration…you'll be what keeps us going" I kissed her forehead.

The shaman nodded, "I will place a barrier around the girl to preserve her and keep herself…but it will not hold forever, try not to take too long".

We gave one last nod and took off, Norio on Shippo's back, Suzu was still recovering from a burn and so she rode beside me.

"Hey Shippo…you think Suzu's got a long lost sister she'd set me up with?" me and Suzu heard Norio whisper to Shippo, she rolled her eyes.

Shippo scoffed, "Even if she does, there's no way I'd inflict you upon my future sister-in-law".

"Really Norio? You're discussing this now" Suzu sighed.

"Hell yeah I am!" he snapped back, his tears gone and a warm smile on his face "Rin would love it! She'd be laughing and trying to convince you both to set me up! It's like you said Kohaku…we carry her with us…it does feel like she's here even now…I'm going to make this adventure…we all are, for her! Tonight we drink sake to our girl, we'll drink her share…we'll laugh at the funny things she'd say!"

_Living life for her, till she could physically live it with us_…sometimes he just made sense.

We sored through the sky with a purpose…I never thought I'd be tracking down pieces of another jewel! But the prize at the end was better than a wish…it was Rin. I wouldn't face the journey alone…I had friends and it was because of the woman I loved! We would face the darkness….

_This may have been the journey that changed it all, but a new one was about to begin!_

**_Sequel; "the journey for her life"_**

**Heya! So that's the end of that, I have started a sequel "the journey for her life" The actual journey for Rin's soul but I'd like to know if you guys think I should even bother continuing, if this one was so unbearable that the thought of another one like it makes you want to rip your hair out please let me know. ****Anyway**** it would be great to get some feedback. Should I write a sequel? Please let me know! thanks to all the people who have review thus far though :)**


End file.
